


All I Wanna See Is You

by banesarchangel



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: AU, Alec's an idiot, Angst, Basically full of fluff, Falling In Love, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Malec, Miscommunication, Mutual Pining, SalecBrotp, Slow Burn, Strangers to Friends, SupportiveIzzy, Sweet!Magnus, add more tags as I go, cinema, drunk!Alec, ish, maia and alec brotp, soft angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-15
Updated: 2018-10-03
Packaged: 2019-05-23 15:59:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 35,313
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14937420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/banesarchangel/pseuds/banesarchangel
Summary: Love happens in mysterious ways. Like sometimes you just go to the movies one day with your friends and your whole world seems to change. Alec unknown last name happens. So now if Magnus makes it his mission to go to the movies every Friday just to see him no one had to know.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A fic no one asked for. This was supposed to be a one shot idea but it soon grew and grew. Thanks to my girl Par for helping grow this story and writing some of it. Follow her @maleconfriday on twitter. 
> 
> I'm also on Twitter if you want to follow me for updates. @malecsxangel

Love happens in mysterious ways. Like sometimes you just go to the movies one day with your friends and your whole world seems to change. Alec unknown last name happened. So now if Magnus makes it his mission to go to the movies every Friday just to see him no one had to know. Except his friends knew and they wouldn’t let it down.

“Magnus just take a picture that way it will last longer.” Ragnor deadpans as they join the line to the counter to buy tickets for their movie that night.

“That way It wouldn’t be as creepy as staring at him 24/7” Raphael added.

Magnus really had no idea what they were talking about. He doesn’t stare. He glances every so often from afar. He insists there is a difference.

“You’re saying taking a picture of a man without his permission is less creepy? No wonder you’re single.” Magnus snorted dismissing his friend's unneeded comments.

“Just ask him out already, we’ve been coming here for 6 months every Friday. It’s obvious he is the only reason. You don’t even like half the movies we see.” Raphael continued.

“That’s not the reason. I just like spending time with my nearest and dearest.” Magnus smiled bashfully at his friends.

“Magnus you’re not fooling any of us,” Cat added. Not Cat too.

Why were they pestering him more than they normally do, it was quite unfair. Can’t he just admire the hazel-eyed beauty whose name was Alec. He was sure it was short for something.

“I deny everything.” But who was he kidding? Alec looked cute tonight. He looked cute every night but tonight his hair was a little more fluffy and tousled than usual like he had just run his hand through his hair. He made his uniform look good, he wasn’t biased but he definitely made that uniform look better than any of the other workers did.

It was really unfair how someone as beautiful as Alec was also innocent and adorable without even realising it.

They had had very limited conversation over the past 6 months never finding the right time to build up the courage and have some, one on one time with him. How do you even ask someone who’s serving you out? “oh, hey I come here every week to see you and talk to you, maybe you’d like to grab a drink sometime.” Yeah no, he’d rather save himself the embarrassment. Imagine if Alec rejected him in front of everyone he’d be mortified and never come to the cinema again.

They hadn’t had any conversations longer than 5 minutes but it was something about him. Alec. He was captivating, drawing Magnus in with every sweet smile and blushing cheeks. The tiny chuckles that would escape his perfect lips. The way his words would always sound slightly more sincere when he told them to enjoy the rest of their night. But he was sure Alec probably got hit on all the time. A guy that good looking how could he not. Maybe it was just Magnus and he was making it all up in his head. But one thing for sure was that he had it completely and utterly bad for this man,

 

Alec noticed when Magnus walked in. He noticed the very first time he came up the counter. Completely taking Alec’s mind for a spin and scrambling to find his feet. Magnus wasn’t like other men he was simply beautiful. Not just his looks, but everything about him. He had this aura about him that Alec just wanted more of. So, when he saw Magnus arrive right on time that Friday night his heart skipped a beat. A giddy feeling surged through his body, butterflies fluttering in circles in his stomach. How could a man he barely knew cause such a reaction he’ll probably never know? But god, he wanted to. He let his eyes gaze maybe a little more than was professional while serving other customers and had to force his eyes away from the stunning man waiting further back in line.

He made his way through the customers one by one, every one feeling like they were taking longer the closer Magnus got to him. He couldn’t wait to see his smile. It was silly being this excited over seeing a man he only knew from a few words, but he really was. It made his boring Friday night shift that bit more enjoyable. Hell, he’d even say he looked forward to working his Friday shift.

A small voice pulled him from his thoughts just as Magnus made his way to the counter waiting to be served.

It was Izzy his younger sister and co-worker.

“You can go on break now, I’ll take over.”

But, Magnus. His mind thought. Was he this pathetic? Yes, he was. He had seen him waiting in the line for the past 5 minutes and he wasn’t about to just walk away. Stumbling his words out he said. “Oh I uhhh, I can. I’m…. I can work for another 10 minutes it’s okay.” Izzy looked at him confused. Alec never refused a break. Until her eyes roamed the line and saw Magnus waiting patiently.

Izzy smiled at him knowingly a grin pulling at her lips. “Oh, of course, another 10 minutes.” She winked and walked away not being subtle at all. Alec, of course, cursed his blush.

The minute he turned around he met deep pools of chocolate brown staring back at him. An innocent polite smile. Alec had to swallow the lump that had formed in his throat clearing his airways.

Magnus grinned stepping forward. “Well, If it isn’t my favourite person.”

Alec bit the side of his lip while holding his cheesy grin in at Magnus’ comment.

“Well if it isn’t my favourite customer.” Magnus’ heart may have jumped at Alec's sweet words. He heard a few snickers from behind him but he decided to ignore them because he had something much better he could focus on, better yet, someone.

Alec couldn’t help but smile the whole time he was serving Magnus. His cheeks would hurt afterwards. “What movie are you here to see?” Alec asks since that’s actually his job and even though standing there staring at Magnus taking in all his beauty might be fun it's unfortunately not what he is paid to do.

“4 tickets to Ready Player One please.” Magnus always had the small urge to just lean his elbows on the counter resting his head on his hands and just gaze up at Alec, but he’d never actually do it.

“Good choice.” Alec smiled back looking down at his screen.

“Have you seen it?”

“Uhh actually no I haven’t” Alec chuckled lightly. “But I have heard it’s good. Plus, I wouldn’t be a very good employee if I told you it was horrible.”

Magnus laughed back, Alec’s little joke catching him and his poor heart off guard.

“Busy day?” Alec asked back

“It wasn’t all the bad, but it’s definitely starting to look up.” He didn’t miss the opportunity to watch a small blush crawl up Alec’s face.

On cue, Alec felt his face heat up at Magnus’ comment and the way he looked at him as he said it. It always made Alec wonder. Was this all just fun and games or could it somehow be more if he let it? Ducking his head briefly trying to hide his tinted cheeks. He forgot Magnus had actually come with his friends as he did every week. Everything else seemed to fade around him when Magnus was around. That was until Magnus’ friends made themselves known by clearing their throats and startling him into action. His cheeks only increasing in colour. “Ahh right your tickets.” He laughed weakly printing them after they paid and handed them to Magnus. His skin tingling where he and Magnus’s fingers brushed against each other. What the fuck was he going to do. His heart wouldn’t stop beating at an increasing speed. He needed air. “Have a great rest of your night and enjoy the movie.”

The sweet sound of Alec’s voice sent shivers over Magnus’ skin as it did every time he heard it.  

Thank god Alec’s break was now he needed a breather to clear his thoughts. He couldn’t go on like this forever. Magnus made him so flustered he needed to get a hold of himself.

 

The air outside was cold. But good he needed the cold air. He needed to think. He hardly knew Magnus, yet he had this effect on him no one else had ever even come close to the way Magnus made his heart flutter. He liked Magnus he knew he did. You don’t blush and squirm around someone like he does when it’s purely platonic. But he was being stupid Magnus would never feel the same about him, would he? He could do way better than Alec.

“Hey,” He heard his sisters voice from behind him. “You alright? You’ve been out here awhile.”

Alec shook his head clearing his head. “Sorry I thought I had another 10 minutes.”

“No no you do. Your break isn’t over.” Izzy interrupted sitting down next to him. “I’m your sister and I know every one of your faces and this one.” She gestured with her hands. “Isn’t a happy one.” She paused slightly. “What’s up?”

“Nothing, it’s nothing.” It was nothing he was just being stupid.

He struggles to open up to people, even his sister. He knows she only means the best and cares for him. But the thought of burdening her with his thoughts he hates the idea of it.

“Alec, I know you. Whether it’s big or small you can talk to me.” She smiled pure and kind assuring him she was here no matter what.

“it’s really nothing I’m just being stupid.” Izzy frowned at him not believing a word of it.

“Does this have something to do with….I don’t know. That guy you always get excited to see?” Alec sighed leaning his head back against the brick wall. Of course, Izzy knew what this was about.

“Yes, but like I said I’m just being silly. I’ll get over it.” He tried brushing it aside.

“Alec anything that is affecting you this much isn’t stupid.” Izzy protested looking at him sternly.

“I think I like him.” It was out he just confessed to someone what he’d been holding in for a couple months now. “I don’t think, I know!” He huffed out quickly after. It was sort of a relief to finally say the words after so long of keeping it to himself but it was also terrifying. What the hell and how the hell was he supposed to do anything with this new realisation.

When he turned his head to see Izzy’s reaction he rolled his eyes. Izzy was grinning ear to ear. “Alec!” She practically yelled. “You’ve never talked to me about guys. Or ever admitted to me that you like someone.”

“Izzy, it’s not a big deal.” He didn’t want this to be a big deal. It was just a small crush. Right?

Izzy quieted down eventually. “I’m sorry it’s just after the last year I’m glad you feel comfortable enough to tell me that.” She paused smiling her loving smile at him calming his heart a little. Izzy was safe. He could feel like this around her without judgement. “For what it’s worth, I think he likes you too.”

Alec scrunched his face at that furrowing his brows. “He doesn’t.” He insisted. He didn’t want false hope. Not now.

“Alec just listen, whatever it is I’m just saying he may care for you too. He smiles at you exactly the same way you smile at him.” She paused getting up and tying her apron around her waist. “Just don’t rule it out. There’s something there Alec.” She smiled once more at him and walked away leaving him a couple more minutes to mull over his thoughts.

He liked Magnus. He smiled at the thought. It was nice to confess that. He just hoped he liked him back. He had no idea what he would do with this information if he’d do anything at all. But, finally, it wasn’t all bottled in just for himself to stress over. He had Izzy to help him.

The rest of the night passed by fast and he couldn’t wait to go home and just pass out feeling exhausted. While he was cleaning he lifted his head at the right time just to see Magnus and his friends walking on their way out. Magnus gave him a small wave and smile on his way out. Something Alec would hold onto until next week.

 

The next Friday came by fast. Not that Magnus was counting. He had been trying to think of ways he could somehow become closer with Alec or at least chat more. But everything just seemed so complicated. But, maybe he was just making it that way. Surely there was a simple solution he just hadn’t thought of it yet. As he walked through the doors he pushed the thoughts aside for another day and made his way to the counter his friends behind him. Alec smiled at him as they both caught each other’s glances.

Magnus looked gorgeous in a dark green shirt first two buttons undone. Black fitted pants with suspenders adding to the whole look. He looked more casual than usual, a little less makeup his hair slightly wavier and to the side. Alec found himself struggling to concentrate on the task at hand. Luckily there weren’t many customers to serve before Magnus made his way up and now thinking about it maybe it wasn’t a good thing because now he couldn’t take his eyes off him.

“What a surprise seeing you here.” Magnus teased walking up taking in Alec’s perfect smile all over again.

“I could say the same to you.” Alec teased back.

“Touché.” Magnus laughed under his breath.

“So, what’s it today?” Alec asked still finding it hard to tear his gaze from Magnus’

“Well, I have caved under peer pressure and am going to see A Quiet Place. You see horror movies aren’t exactly my thing.” He sighed a shy smile playing on his lips.

“You’re not alone. Horror movies have never been my thing either. I can never make it through without covering my eyes at least once during it.” The thought made Magnus want to witness it with his own eyes.

“I’m more of pulls blanket over my face, but seen as I don’t have a blanket I think I have to use my hands instead."

Alec’s mind strayed to being cuddled up with Magnus under a blanket trying to get through a horror movie together.  Why did he want that so bad? He sighed internally and moved on.

Alec printed out the tickets once they paid and handed them over. “If I hear any screams I’ll know not to come running.” Alec teased pulling his lip between his teeth watching Magnus mock offence.

“Are you saying you wouldn’t come and be my knight and shining armour?” Magnus felt giddy at the thought.

“If you needed me I’d be there.” There was an underlying sense of honesty in Alec’s statement that took Magnus by surprise. “But, I’m sure you can take care of yourself.”

“You’re not wrong.” Magnus laughed. “But if I need fresh air, can I come to talk to you?” He didn’t know where the courage to say that came from but it was out there waiting for utter embarrassment or maybe Alec would surprise him.

“Of course,” Alec replied like it was obvious that would be his answer the whole time. “Enjoy the movie,” Alec added. To which Magnus followed with a quick “I’ll try.” While mouthing a silent “Help me.” Alec had to repress his laughter as another customer made their way up to be served.

 

The next hour or two went by what felt like forever. He had a headache from all the noise around the cinema, plus his mind constantly turning thinking about Magnus wasn’t helping.

Alec could have sworn the darn clock was broken feeling like it had been stuck for the past 30 minutes. He tried to just push through and shake off the bad mood he was feeling.

Wiping down the benches back turned away from the counter he thought he heard a voice but probably just imagined it as he wasn’t expecting to see him again but when the voice said his name again he knew it wasn’t his imagination.

Turning around he was greeted with Magnus’ warm smile.

“Hey,” He said back to him but it came out as a sigh.

“Why so glum?” Magnus asked concerned. “Are your co-workers making you do all the work?” He tried to lighten the mood with a stupid joke but it didn’t seem to work. He could tell something was up the minute he came up to the counter. After it took him two tries to get him to respond. His mind must have been somewhere else. The small frown on his face when Alec turned around didn’t soothe any of Magnus’ worries.

“No, no.” Alec laughed but it was forced and they could both tell. How did Magnus know something was bothering him? “I always do out front.”

“Ah, I see putting the pretty one out in front.” Magnus cringed at his own words.

Alec fought his blush at the word pretty and shook it off. It seemed to click that Magnus was alone and his friends were nowhere to be seen. “Where are your friends?”

“Bathroom,” Magnus replied instantly.

“So, you made it through the movie okay?” Alec laughed lightheartedly trying to change the subject.

“I did.” Magnus sighed. “Remind me never to let Raphael choose the movie again.”

“That bad?”

“That and they make fun of me for covering my eyes.” Magnus huffed rolling my eyes.

Just like that Alec’s bad mood had gone. Even though he didn’t know Magnus very well he felt like there was just something about him that calmed him and made him want to smile. His personality so infectious. So, inviting, so warm. He could talk to him all day if he ever got the chance.

“Have you seen it? You probably see a lot of movies since you work here?” Magnus added.

Alec stepped closer leaning against the counter. “Actually, I don’t go see a lot of movies, surprisingly.” Now that he thought about he had only seen maybe between 5 or 10 since working here. “I never really get the time. I’m either busy or my friends are so yeah.” He paused for a beat. “I do wish I could go see more.” Maybe with you, he felt like adding but chickened out and when he brought his mind back to earth he noticed Magnus looking behind him looking like he was trying to find someone else. Alec turned around confused but then he saw his sister standing there and that’s when dread and realisation started to sink in. How could he be so stupid?

All this time, every Friday. He was interested in Izzy. He should have clicked on sooner no one rarely picked him he should have been used to the feeling of rejection but it hurt more with Magnus. He had let himself believe that maybe he felt something for him in return. Swallowing the pain and taking a deep breath, he turned back to Magnus. “That’s Izzy, my sister.”

Magnus detected a small change in Alec’s voice. Disappointment? Hurt? He was confused as what had just happened. Alec was smiling one minute and looking like someone just ripped his heart out the next. Trying not to show his confusion he pushed it aside hoping he had nothing to do with it. “I can see the resemblance.” He spoke trying to clear the awkward tension. “She’s very beautiful.”

Alec agreed. She was indeed stunning. But all he could manage in reply was a forced smile.

Magnus didn’t know how to get out of this now awkward situation. Why was Alec being weird suddenly? Did he cross a line without realising it?

Alec caught a glimpse of Magnus’ friends appearing from the bathroom. Thank god, he thought. He needed to be alone. “You should get back to your friends, don’t want to keep them waiting.” Alec gestured his hand to behind Magnus.

“Ah right, well nice seeing you Alec. Goodnight.” Magnus smiled leaving feeling frazzled. Maybe next week he’d be back to normal.

“See ya,” Alec smiled and waved sighing a breath of relief once he left. He felt so stupid and embarrassed at himself for letting himself have those thoughts. He should never have spoken to Izzy, He was right all along. Magnus would never go for someone like him.

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

 

“Alec?” A quiet voice came from behind him. “Alec.” The voice spoke again.

The gentle hand on his shoulder was what pulled him back. Thoughts that he didn’t particularly want to have right now.

“Is everything okay?” Izzy asked her voice kind and gentle.

Alec shook his head out of his haze. “What? Oh yeah, I’m fine. Sorry, I just zoned out for a second." He laughed weakly. He would be fine. It was silly to get this caught up over a man he barely even knew.

He knew she wouldn’t believe him for a second but he just didn’t want to talk about it yet.

He finished cleaning and went to grab his stuff and got ready to leave. He just wanted this night to end or wish it never happened in the first place.

Izzy watched him walk away. Something had happened that she didn’t know about. But what she did know was that something was obviously upsetting her brother. She could read him like a book. Deciding to allow him space until he was ready to talk she dropped it. She just hoped he would eventually reach out and not shove it down deep like he did a lot previously. Alec deserved so much happiness and she only wished he would find that one day. Seeing her brother so upset, it broke her heart.

 

* * *

 

 

Magnus left the cinema that night feeling confused and he couldn’t stop himself from thinking about it the rest of the night. The complete 180 Alec did on him it left him feeling frazzled. The last thing he wanted was to ruin whatever this was between them. Knowing Alec was upset didn’t sit well with him and even worse if it was him who caused it.

Magnus tried to brush it off as Alec may have just had a bad day and just desperately wanted to go home? Was he reaching? He didn’t know but he would hold onto that hope. He just wanted to see that beautiful smile again. He wanted to watch his eyes light up and take in every flicker of colour and memorize each one.

“Magnus?” He shook his head startled by Cat’s voice. “I know you love me but we are at your place.” Cat laughed.

Shocked they were already at his apartment he went to get out but Cat placed a concerning hand on his arm looking at him seriously. “You okay? You’ve been awfully quiet since we left the cinema.”

“I’m fine.” He assured her with the biggest smile he could muster. Was he fine? He didn’t even know himself.

“It’s not anything to do with the guy you like at the cinema, Is it? I saw you two talking before we left.” Normally he would tell her everything. But he was so confused himself he didn’t even know where to start.

“Cat I’m fine.” He said again making sure his smile and voice was convincing. He said a quick goodbye to Raph and Ragnor and made his way up to his loft. Sighing as he flopped against his sheets begging for sleep.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Friday came around faster than they both realised.

Magnus felt more nervous than normal. His heart beating slightly faster. The unknown. How was Alec going to be? Was he going to be okay or was he still annoyed at something that Magnus was completely unaware about? He was better than this. Pulling himself together he followed his friends inside.

“Why are you so nervous? You’ve done this literally 100 times.” Raph commented from his side.

Magnus sighed. “I know but you should have seen his face last week.”

“Relax, I’m sure it was nothing.” Cat sent him a comforting smile.

He was being stupid.

 

* * *

 

 

 

Alec saw him as soon as he walked through the door. Instead of joy and thrill, he was just filled with dread. The reminder that Magnus didn’t feel the same about him. He wanted to escape and not face him. It hurt, rejection. Not being good enough. Why was he never good enough?

Looking around for someone to take over quickly before Magnus made his way up to him, he couldn’t find anyone in arms reach without causing a fuss. Coming to the realisation he was going to have to face him. Those beautiful brown eyes that made his heart swoon, he could get through it, he’d be fine. Or so he thought.

Magnus looked gorgeous. He really hated everything right now.

“Hello, handsome.” Magnus put on a brave face and just tried to make things feel normal but when Alec didn’t smile back his heart sank.

“Hey, Magnus. What can I get you today?” Magnus was caught off guard by the blunt response. Panic built in his chest.

“Oh, I uh.” Magnus’ mind went blank for a second.

Alec frowned as he saw something flash across Magnus’ face. Was it hurt? No, it couldn’t be.

They continued through the standard procedure of them paying and Alec giving them their tickets. It all felt robotic and stiff. Awkward and uncomfortable.

Magnus left feeling more confused than ever but still wishing he could have seen that beautiful smile sweep across Alec’s face.

 

* * *

 

 

“Alec, What the fuck was that?” Izzy pulled him aside.

“Yeah, dude. That wasn’t cool.” Maia added.

He loved his best friend and sister but he really couldn’t be bothered dealing with whatever this was his mind a complete mess from the frustratingly good-looking man who just left his presence.

“I have no idea what you two are talking about?” Alec sighed moving passed them. “I’m going on my break.”

“Nah uh. You aren’t getting away that easily.” Maia pulled him back.

“What is it? Get it over with. Did I overfill a popcorn? Forget some candy? What is it?”

“Are you serious? You really don’t know?” Izzy frowned her eyebrows in confusion.

“He’s more of an idiot than we thought,” Maia said to Izzy like he wasn’t even there.

“Um, I’m right here. I can hear you!” What the hell were they doing?

“We know.” They both said back in unison. It was kinda scary to witness.

“Can you two just get the point already, I would like to take my break.”

Izzy jumped in first. “What was with the way you were acting towards Magnus?” That was not what he was expecting.

“Huh?”

“Why are you so clueless?" Maia huffed. “The past six months you’ve been like a giddy teenage boy and now all of sudden you are as cold as ice towards him. What happened?”

“I thought you liked him?” Izzy added.

He couldn’t help but feel like he was being pinned in a corner.

“Look, I really don’t want to talk about it right now. Please, you wouldn’t understand.” How did his Friday turn into the worst day of his life?

Izzy and Maia were quiet for a little both communicating between each other without speaking. It was freaky.

“Alec, we're sorry we just care. And it was just out of character for you. We can tell you’re upset and we just want to make sure you are okay.” Izzy stepped forward resting her hand on his arm. He welcomed the comforting touch.

Maia smiled in support. He knew they were coming from a good place but he wasn’t ready to talk yet.

“Thank you. I love you two. But like I said. I’m just not ready to talk.” He spoke quietly feeling emotionally exhausted. “I promise as soon as I’m ready, I will.” He was hoping that would satisfy them.

“Of course, I’m always here for you Alec.” Maia pulled him for a warm hug making him smile for a brief second.

“Now if you two are done interrogating. Can I go on my break now?”

“Yes, yes. Go.” Izzy practically pushed him out the back making him laugh.

His two favourite girls never failed to make him smile.

 

* * *

 

 

 

Magnus and his friends were waiting for the movie to start but his mind just wouldn’t shut off from the cold reception he got out there with Alec. He wasn’t as warm as he used to be.

“Cat.” He said abruptly. “Did Alec seem weird to you? Like annoyed?”

“I don’t know Alec like you do, I never said a word to him. I wouldn’t know Magnus, sorry.”

Leaning his head back against his chair he sighed rather loudly.

“Magnus, what’s going on? No one sighs like that for nothing.” Cat continued.

“Nothing it’s just.” He paused. “Actually, it is something. Last week we were talking and then all of a sudden Alec went quiet and standoffish. I thought maybe it was because he was tired or was just having a bad day? But he did the same thing today and it’s just making me think. Did I do something I don’t know I did?”

“Maybe you should go talk to him?” Caterina suggested.

“And possibly make it worse?”

“You don’t know if it will make it worse. It might make things a bit clearer for both of you.” Cat had a good point. If he would follow her advice was another thing. His head getting in the way. “Just think about it, Magnus. This is obviously affecting you more than you are letting on.”

She was right, she was always right.

“I’ll think about it,” he responded quickly just before the movie started.

That night when they went to leave he looked around for Alec. Seeing If there was a chance to speak to him but he wasn’t anywhere in sight. Fridays used to be his favourite day. A day he could push his own problems aside and enjoy Alec’s company. It wasn’t so fun anymore.

 

* * *

 

 

 

The next few times Magnus came in it was exactly the same. Alec was distant, there were fewer smiles. And he didn’t see the happiness in his eyes anymore. He was starting to think he didn’t do anything, maybe Alec just didn’t want to be his friend. Or maybe he saw something he didn’t like. He should be used to not feeling good enough. His former partners were never shy of expressing what they didn’t like about him. He decided that night he would no longer let Alec affect him. If that actually worked…well, the remained to be seen.

 

 

“Alec, what’s wrong? I have let you sulk for a couple of weeks now. So, spill!” Izzy appeared at his side as he was enjoying the cold nighttime breeze.

Sighing he rested his head against the brick wall. “It’s just, I don’t know if I can talk to you about this.”

A flash of hurt flew across Izzy’s eyes making him feel even worse. “What? Why?” She asked.

“I’m sorry, It’s just awkward.” How the hell was he supposed to even breach the subject that the guy he had been crushing on for 7 months actually liked her? Talk about humiliating.

“You can tell me anything, Alec. You know I would never judge.” She sat down moving closer to him with her kind eyes begging him to open up. “Please, I’m worried about you.”

Pulling his legs in close, he tucked his head down and just blurted it out. “It’s about Magnus.”

“I wasn’t hundred percent sure, but I had a hunch it might have been. Do you want to talk about it?”

“Yes, but no.” He appreciated his sister so much. She’d been his rock growing up. The one person he could turn to, to confide in. But this had been one of the worst situations he had been put in. If he could he'd just curve around the full story.

“Alec?”

“He doesn’t like me.”

“Yeah, nice joke.” Izzy laughed like it was the funniest thing she had ever heard and it was like someone stabbing him in the heart. Catching his reaction her laugh fell flat and went serious. “Wait you’re serious?”

“Oh, I’m very serious.”

“Explain, please because I am very confused.” That made two of them.

“It’s just.” Alec started but immediately stopped.

He didn’t know if he could tell her if he could let her know that it was her that Magnus actually liked. But right now, he felt like he couldn’t hold it in any longer otherwise he’d drive himself insane.

He had to let this weight off his shoulders. “Magnus asked about you the other day and it hit me, and I..realized it’s you.” He was trembling at his point. All his emotions feeling exposed.

“It’s me what?” Izzy asked looking confused.

Alec sighed resting his head on the wall behind him.

He hoped she would understand without asking too many questions, without having to say the words that hurt him most out loud. “It’s you...He likes you.” He kept his eyes shut for a few more seconds until Izzy broke the silence, with a laugh of all things.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“I am not!” He insisted his voice sharp.

“Alec,” She laughed again. Could she take this seriously, it felt like she was mocking him.

“Alec, he most definitely does not like me.” Alec shook his head he was almost certain. “Alec listen to me. He has never spoken to me, how can he like me?”

Alec shrugged. “I don’t know, he just does.”

“Alec, no. Just listen to me.” Izzy was persistent. Reaching for Alec’s hands she held them as she spoke. “I don’t know how or why you think this but just listen. The way Magnus looks at you, it’s the way everybody wishes to be looked at. He smiles at you like you hung the moon and the stars. I even hear his friends mocking him about the way he looks at you. You used to look at him the same way.”

Was she right? Did he just make this all up in his head? He just jumped to conclusions because he was afraid of feeling what he was feeling but just ended up hurting Magnus and himself in the process. 

“Oh god.” He groaned. “I’ve ruined everything.” How was he going to come back from this?

“No, you haven’t. Just go out there and talk to him.” Could he do that though?

“I wish that was as easy as it sounds.” Why did he always get himself in the worst situations?

“I believe in you.” Izzy smiled. Alec couldn’t help it, he ended up laughing at how ridiculous this whole situation had gotten. “I can’t wait to tell Maia how much of an idiot you are,” Izzy added

“Don’t you dare!.” He shoved her playfully with his shoulder.

“No promises.” Izzy grinned and walked away leaving Alec to try and figure out a way to fix this all.

 

* * *

 

 

Magnus and his friends tumbled out of the theatre one by one. The others were laughing about something but Magnus didn’t really feel like joining in. All this shouldn’t affect him so much but he seemed to be more attached to annoyingly handsome Alec than he thought.

“Magnus, hey.” Speaking of which. It felt like his mind was playing a cruel trick on him because he could have sworn Alec sounded upbeat. Something he definitely hadn’t heard in a while.

Alec was trying not to give it away but he was nervous, extremely so. He had so much making up to do.  

“Uh, hey Alec.”

Alec was sending him so many mixed signals he couldn’t keep up.

“How are you?” Was Alec really trying to start a conversation with him right now? Pretending like he hadn’t been the worlds grumpiest cat over the past couple of weeks.

“I’m great.” He said back having to force it out through his teeth. He cringed at how fake it sounded, “Look, I’m really sorry but I’m super tired and have to go.”

“Oh,” Alec would be lying if said his heart didn’t sink after hearing that. “Okay, see you next Friday then?”

“Right, yeah, next Friday.” Magnus really wasn’t trying to sound rude but that’s all his voice could muster right now.

As Alec watched Magnus leave he wanted the ground to swallow him whole for how stupid he had been. He could have just lost his chance at finding someone special. He could come back from this, couldn’t he?

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again thanks to Par for helping with this fic <3 follow her on twitter @maleconfriday
> 
> Let me know your thoughts etc. 
> 
> I'm on twitter @malecsxangel if you want to keep up with updates etc.


	3. Chapter 3

Now that all Alec wanted was for Friday to come around it felt like it took forever. Everyday feeling slower than the last.

Thursday night he went to sleep with a swarm of flutters in his stomach knowing he’d get to see Magnus tomorrow. He wasn’t sure how he would go about approaching him, it wasn’t exactly the easiest scenario where he could just walk up to him in the street. He would be working and Magnus would be going to see a movie. However it would play out, he was only hoping for the best.

When he walked into work the next day he was met by two annoying smiles. He hated them sometimes. But he couldn’t help but smile back because under all the guilt and hurt he had caused he was feeling optimistic at having another shot and as Izzy liked to tell him to “Stop being an idiot.” He couldn’t promise he wouldn’t be one as he was a bit clueless when it came to certain things but he would try. There was something about Magnus that just made him want to try.

“So, Alec.” Maia raised her eyebrows a couple of times “ready for tonight?”

“Ready to see that as you so nicely put one time ‘God’s gift to this world’.” Izzy and Maia both laughed.

“I never said that!” He protested. “Did I?” He questioned himself feeling unsure. He had said a lot of things about Magnus over the past 7 months.

“I recall a certain drunk night about a month after Magnus came in and let’s just say you let it all out.” Maia snickered.

Alec cowered his head in embarrassment. “I’m never going to drink around you two again.”

“It’s okay, Alec.” Maia smiled walking towards him placing a hand on his shoulder. “We love our chaotic gay especially when he’s drunk.” Maia grinned.

Alec rolled his eyes at her, they’d never let him live this down.

“Okay, okay. Whatever I’m going to get dressed. Stop harassing me.” He groaned walking out back. That wasn’t exactly a bad start to his night.

His night wasn’t going so bad, the only thing was that every time he checked the clock it felt like it had only moved 5 minutes in what felt like 30. 

“Alec, you know what they say.” Izzy appeared at his side.

“And what’s that?”

“A watched jug never boils.”

“I’m pretty sure that’s not the saying.” He frowned

“Well, it’s something along those lines.” She waved her hands around. “But that’s not the point. The point is watching the clock tick every single second is not going to make it go any faster.”

“I know.” Alec groaned.

“Why don’t you go do something else like refill up on stock or clean. It’s torture enough for me watching you count every second.”

As much he would normally hate that suggestion he jumped at the opportunity.

“Okay, thanks Iz.”

It turned out doing that was, in fact, a great distraction as soon as he finished it hit 7 pm and the small flutters came back, nerves and excitement mixed together. Shaking off the jitters he walked back out and went back on the cashier.

He wondered how Magnus would be dressed tonight. Even though he himself wasn’t exactly that fussed over how he dressed he was always excited to see how Magnus accessorised his outfits or made a specific item of clothing he never thought would look good on anyone look good.

7 pm soon turned into 7:30 maybe they were just coming for a later movie this time? He tried to stay optimistic. But as the clock soon hit 9 pm he lost all hope. After all the waiting tonight, he felt completely exhausted. In a way, it felt like his chance had fully slipped through his fingers.

Even though he knew it was pointless at this point he still found himself glancing at the door every now and then.

“There’s always next week.” Izzy tried to reassure him.

“Yeah,” He shrugged.

He hoped there would be a next week and many after that. He didn’t realise until now just how much seeing Magnus every week had become a big part of his life. He may not have spoken to him for longer than 10 minutes but he still felt like he knew him. He knew his smiles, his laugh, the way he always looked happy with his friends. How he always tried to make other people around him feel special. That’s what kept Alec wanting more. He knew there was so much more to this man. More to love, to care about. He wanted to give him that eventually. But picturing that wasn’t so easy anymore.

 

* * *

 

 

Magnus spent that night eating takeaway lost in paperwork that he needed to catch up on. A part of him wondered if his absence at the movie theatre was noticed. Did he want his absence to be noticed? Only by one person. A person who didn’t even seem to care about him. But he just couldn’t stop himself from thinking about him. Those hazel eyes keeping him hostage.

Spending the night tucked up on the couch with his lovable cat was maybe just what he needed.

 

* * *

 

 

 

Magnus didn’t show for the 3rd week in a row and Alec was starting to lose the little hope he had.

He missed him. He wanted to hear his voice again. His voice that had the ability to feel like it was a warm blanket making him feel safe. He missed the shivers that would dance down his spine when they locked eyes. He even missed the heated blush that would appear on his cheeks when Magnus made a small compliment. He wished he had picked up on it sooner. The flirting, well that’s what Izzy says it was. He missed all these things but most of all he just missed him, all of him. Everything that made Magnus who he was.

 

He and Izzy were walking to the car after their Friday shift. “I can practically hear your thoughts from here and maybe it’s starting to bug me so next week take Friday off and wait for him to arrive.” She said it all so fast he struggled to catch it all.

“what makes you think he will come next week? He hasn’t come the last 3 times.”

“Maybe he was busy, Alec. You never really know the full story. You’ve got nothing to lose if he shows GREAT if he doesn’t that’s okay too.”

Alec sighed rubbing his forehead with his fingers. This all seemed like a lot of effort.

“Please?” He knew he wasn’t going to be able to say no to that face.

“Okay, okay. Can we get in the car now I’m freezing.” He shivered.

“I’m meeting Simon at the bar for drinks do you want to tag along?”

“And be the third wheel? No thanks.”

Izzy scoffed. “I think you mean I’d be the third wheel.”

Alec grinned. Seeing his best mate wouldn’t be so bad after all.

“Okay, let’s go.”

 

* * *

 

 

“What are we going to do about this sulky mess?” Raphael was talking to Caterina like he wasn’t there.

“I’m not sulking!” He protested. “I’m busy with work, I’m a busy businessman.”

“More like giving yourself more work so you have an excuse to ignore a certain someone.” Cat gave him that look like she knew exactly what was going through his head.

“Why do you even care. That certain someone doesn’t even care so why should I?” Magnus leaned back on the couch wine in hand, laptop on his lap.

“Magnus, you never even asked, Alec, is it? What was going on maybe you two just got your wires crossed.” Caterina replied.

“We wouldn’t care. But your mood has been so bad even your cat doesn’t want to be around you.” Raphael added just as Chairman Meow decided to hope of the couch where he was lying next to him and run into some other room.

“No! he loves me it’s just you two he doesn’t like.”

“I have to ask. You haven’t even been on a date with this guy, you don’t even know his last name. Why are you so affected by this?” Caterina asked sitting down next to him stealing Chairman’s spot.

He frowned at the question. He didn’t have to think too hard. The answer was already on the tip of his tongue. “I don’t have to know his last name to know he’s someone special. I can’t really explain it but the second I laid eyes on him I just had a feeling I had to get to know him.”

Caterina and Raphael just stared at him not saying anything making him feel uncomfortable.

“Are you gonna say anything?” Magnus questioned. Normally they never shut up.

“I don’t care what you have planned next week, we are going next Friday and you are going to talk to him.” Even if he wanted to, he would never say no to Cat especially when she had that look in her eye.

Magnus agreed.

 

* * *

 

 

“I don’t know why you suggested this, he probably isn’t going to show.” Alec groaned as Izzy straightened out his clothes.

He had tried to tell her the whole week this was stupid but she insisted he do it and it was extremely hard to say no to his sister and succeed.

“A bit of optimism would be nice, Alec.” Izzy scolded as she continued to fiddle with his buttons on his shirt.

“What are you doing?” He said his voice raising an octave or two. Maybe he was slightly nervous.

“This is buttoned up to your neck you look like you can’t even breathe.” She replied as she popped the top button. “That’s better.” She stood humming to herself. “Maybe one more.” She stepped forward and Alec moved back almost hitting the table where he was currently waiting.

“No.” He protested. “One is fine, Jesus.”

“Sorry, I’m just excited for you. You’re finally doing something for you.” She beamed her eyes brimming with tears.

He pulled her in for a hug. “Iz, what are you doing don’t cry.” He laughed pulling her in close.

“I’m not crying there was a bit of dust.” She laughed back.

He pulled back rolling his eyes.

“You seem so sure he’s coming tonight? How do you know?”

“Just call it a hunch.” She grinned back like she was hiding something.

Alec frowned worried as to what was going on.

“Relax.” She exclaimed patting his shoulders. “You got this.” She kissed him quickly on the cheek and went back to work leaving Alec alone with his thoughts, which was never a good idea.

He told himself not to get his hopes up. But, they were up. He blamed Izzy for that.

What would he even do if Magnus did show up? He wasn’t one to be spontaneous. As long as he didn’t freeze on the spot he should be fine. He hoped.

He wanted Magnus to walk through those doors so bad if it was the only good thing to come out of tonight.

Nerves ticked through his body making him feel jumpy. Underneath the nerves were excitement. It was only small but it was there and that’s what he would cling onto to try and push the nerves away. Inhaling deep breaths one after the other he watched 5 minutes turn into 10 and 10 into 20 and so on. The hope he had was dwindling, going home ordering a pizza and wallowing in greasy cheese sounded like a better option.

Sitting down in the chair behind him he watched the ground unable to watch the door any longer.

Every time he heard the door open he was tempted to look but was scared to, he didn’t want to have to endure any more disappointment. Until the one time he did and he wasn’t disappointed. He had to fight the ever-growing smile that was forming on his lips. Magnus looked amazing, he always looked amazing. He hadn’t seen him in 3 weeks and the second he saw him he just had the urge to go up to him. He missed his voice so much. What was happening to him?

 

 

Magnus’ friends were so hell-bent on him making it to this movie, they wouldn’t let him back out. He wasn’t sure how he’d feel when he saw Alec but once he opened the door his eyes went directly to the counter where he normally found the familiar fluffy dark brown hair and pure hazel orbs. Alec wasn’t there and he was disappointed.

“Magnus, hey.” Magnus shot his head around so fast he felt like he got whiplash.

Alec.

He was standing there the brightest smile on his face looking unbelievably handsome. Everything else just melted away for that split second.

Alec was in something other than his work uniform and it took a minute for Magnus to notice but when he did he had to try hard not to stare too long.

Slim dark skinny jeans, a soft blue button-up shirt. His hair styled but still adorning that just woke up look Magnus loved so much. Alec looked amazing. But why was he here and not behind the counter? Not that Magnus was complaining.

“Alec, hey.” He was smiling back without even realising. “No work today?” As soon as he asked the question Alec’s hand flew to the back of his neck scratching at the skin. A nervous tick Magnus had caught up on over the months.

“Uhh, no. No work today.” Alec cleared his throat. “No friends tonight?” Alec stumbled out a question.

“Well, they were supposed to be here.” Magnus paused taking his eyes off Alec for a minute and checking his phone. “Speaking of friends, it appears I have been ditched.”

“Oh, really?” Alec was surprised but also slightly relieved as it gave him the opportunity to talk to Magnus.

“Yup, they said ‘Sorry we can’t make it but enjoy your night.’ I honestly question my friendships sometimes. They were so adamant that I make it tonight. I give up.” Magnus laughed.

Alec was about to laugh too when it all clicked and figured this all couldn’t just be a coincidence. Izzy being so determined to get him to have the night off. Magnus friends being so adamant in him coming tonight.

“I think I just realised something,” Alec spoke sitting down at the table next to them. Magnus followed.

“And that would be?”

“I think this was set up.”

Set up? Magnus was confused.

“You mean, like me and you?” He tried to ignore the giddy feeling in his stomach.

“Izzy was very determined for me to take tonight off and wait for you, so.” The thought of Alec going to all this effort just to wait for him not even knowing if he was actually coming or not. Magnus’ heart did a little skip.

“So, my friends cancelling wasn’t just a coincidence? Huh.” He laughed to himself. But it soon died down.

He wasn’t sure what was going to happen now? He didn’t exactly want to leave.

“I don’t think so.” Alec paused gathering his thoughts begging his brain and mouth not to fuck this up. “Do you want to go get something to eat? Or if you’ve already eaten we could get a drink or do something else? But only if you want to. If you don’t want to that’s fine.” He was cut off by a smooth finger meeting his lips. Alec couldn’t stop his lips pulling into a smile at the small touch. When Magnus moved his finger away Alec’s lips were left tingling.

“Yes, but on one condition.” Whatever that condition was Alec would happily oblige.

Magnus was trying to contain himself. Was this really happening? Of all the things he thought might happen tonight this was not one of them.

“That condition being, I have always wondered if Alec is short for something. Is it?”

Alec couldn’t get the words out fast enough. “It is actually. My full name is Alexander but everyone just calls me Alec.”

Alexander was a beautiful name. “Alexander.” He said rolling it with his tongue. “I like it.”

Alec liked it too especially when Magnus said it. He was pretty sure he was blushing but he blushed so much around Magnus he didn’t care anymore.

“So, Alexander. Where shall we go eat?” Alec would never get sick of hearing Magnus say his full name.

“There is a great sushi place I heard of just around the corner if you want to go there?”

“Let’s go.” Magnus stood up reaching for his hand.

When Magnus’ hand joined his. The jolt that rushed to his heart was almost overwhelming. Their hands fit so perfectly together. Intertwining his fingers, a little tighter round Magnus’ making sure this was real he turned around to see if Izzy and Maia were prying. They were. But they looked proud and happy. He felt proud of himself too. This was a big step for him but next to Magnus he didn’t feel so scared.

 


	4. Chapter 4

They were alone in the sushi restaurant and honestly, Magnus really liked it. It was small, but cosy and not too crowded for a Friday night.

“So, you like sushi?” Magnus asked as they gave back the two menus to the waiter and watched her leave.

“I do,”

“You don’t?” He started to second guess himself. Maybe Magnus hated sushi, he should have let Magnus choose the restaurant.

Magnus had to hold back a chuckle as he watched Alec overthink. Reaching out and barely touching his fingers “No, no I really do. In fact, sushi is one of my favourites.”

Alec let the breath he had been holding go as Magnus smiled at him. Why was he being such a mess?

They stayed silent for a little while after that. Magnus letting his gaze roam around the whole restaurant, the wooden black windows, the classic tables, the doors that swayed as people would enter and leave. Whereas Alec was silent, just staring down at his hands with the odd glance up to Magnus. He didn’t want this to be awkward. But it was.

“Alec, is something wrong?” Magnus broke trying to find Alec’s eyes. The silence was killing.

Alec hadn’t intended to be so quiet he had planned to apologize to Magnus for being so cold towards him but his brain short-circuited and didn’t even know where to start.

Just before Alec went to open his mouth and speak Magnus cut him off. “If you don’t want to do this I can just g-“

“No!” Alec blurted out abruptly. “No,” He said again this time a bit calmer. “Please don’t go, I want this.” his heartbeat increasing.

Magnus raised his eyebrows as in to say, “keep going”

“I just wanted to apologize.” Magnus would be lying if he said he didn’t want a small explanation to Alec’s hostile behaviour for the previous weeks. “For basically being an asshole.”

Magnus stopped him there. “Alec, I wouldn’t go that far. You weren’t an asshole. Never.”

“I was rude, and that wasn’t fair.” Magnus couldn’t really disagree.

“If you don’t mind me asking, what happened for you to become like that towards me?” He paused now feeling vulnerable with his next words “If I did something?”

This time Alec reached out his hand to Magnus, never getting sick of the small spark that would wave through his body. “You did nothing.” Alec shook his head. “It was all me and my idiot self.”

Magnus intertwined their fingers. “You’re not an idiot Alec, please don’t call yourself that.”

Something about those words found a special place in Alec’s heart. Such sincerity behind them he was taken by surprise.

A small smile crept onto Alec’s lips. “I was stupid and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have pushed you away and been so rude. I want to be here with you.”

Magnus returned his smile. “You’re forgiven.” Magnus was going to ask what conclusion he jumped to but felt it wasn’t the right time. “So,” Magnus started deciding to change the subject. “I don’t really know a lot about you. What does the day in the life of Alec look like other than working at the cinema?”

Which then lead to them both talking about their careers, goals etc. Alec studies part-time at Uni. He studies business and management. Magnus didn’t want to say it was a coincidence that he, in fact, co-owns a business with his friend Raphael. The nightclub pandemonium which Alec seemed interested in. Time flew by and soon their food had arrived.

“Try this one too! It’s delicious.” Magnus exclaimed pointing to the dish named Uramaki.

Alec hummed in agreement once he took a bite. He hadn’t ever really gone past trying the general sushi along with nigiri. But Magnus was making him try everything in sight, and to his surprise, he really enjoyed them all.

He and Magnus continued to share bites, talking through the night.

“So, I know dear Izzy is your sister. But do you have any other siblings?” Magnus asked intrigued to find out more about this beautiful man sitting in front of him.

Alec swallowed his last mouthful taking a quick sip of his drink before speaking. “I do. Little Brother, Max.” Alec paused. “He’s a lot younger than me and Izzy.”

“what about you? Any siblings?” Alec asked.

Magnus paused getting that uneasy feeling he always did when people asked about his family. But that feeling soon eased when he looked into Alec’s hazels calming him and letting the panic that had risen subsided.

“Unfortunately, no, but I consider my friends my family. They’ve been with me through thick and thin.” Magnus smiled but Alec could see that was only the surface. There was a deep pool of unknown pain behind those brown eyes staring back at him that Alec was yet to know. Alec smiled back.

“Those are the people who come in with you every Friday?”

“Yes, Caterina, Raphael and Ragnor.” Magnus paused considering his next words. He didn’t know why but he felt like he could tell Alec these things. “We all met in foster care, have been inseparable ever since.”

A rush of something Alec couldn’t quite put his finger on surged to his heart, happy that Magnus felt like he could tell him that.

A brief moment of doubt did enter Magnus’ brain as he said those words but again those soft, gentle eyes and warm smile that were staring back at him pushed that away immediately.

“They sound amazing.”

“They really are.” Magnus felt himself go shy under Alec’s gaze. All they were doing was taking but Alec made him feel like he was the only one in the room.

Continuing to eat Alec started trying more things wanting to test his palette. Just as Alec placed an unknown item in his mouth Magnus’ eyes went wide sending Alec into confusion.

“No, no, no!” Magnus blurted out but it was too late as Alec had already started chewing. Magnus had to hold back his laughter as Alec’s eyes then went wide and reached for water.

A sudden burst of an indescribable heat spread through Alec’s mouth. He didn’t want to embarrass himself in front of Magnus trying to subtly reach for the water to the side of them.

Magnus hid his ever-growing smile behind his hand. He found it so adorable. “Alexander, do you know what that was?”

Alec’s mind went blank. Was he meant to know what a small blob of green substance was supposed to be? “I don’t.” He answered unsurely. “A little hot, but nice.” He tried to brush off the burning sensation that was still very much lingering in his mouth.

Magnus couldn’t contain himself and chuckled at Alec’s words. “You don’t have to lie.”

A smile began to pull at Alec’s own lips his resolve soon wavering. “Okay. I lied it was awful and so incredibly hot. What the hell was that?” He blurted out reaching for another sip of water.

Magnus fell into uncontrollable laughter getting weird looks from around them, but he didn’t care.

“Stop laughing.” Alec pouted, but in reality, Alec wanted to hear that beautiful laugh every day.

“Alec, darling.” Alec’s heart stuttered against his chest at the pet name. “That was wasabi.”

“Oh,” Alec felt like the dumbest idiot. “I thought maybe it was avocado, but that makes a lot more sense.” Alec wanted the floor to swallow him whole. But the smile currently on Magnus’ was worth it.

“Why would you think it was avocado?” Magnus’ laughter died down. Alec really was working his way into his heart with that precious pout and gorgeous face.

“I don’t know, oh god.” Alec buried his face in his hands.

Magnus reached over and pulled those hands away that was shielding his stunning eyes. “I haven’t laughed like that in a while. Please don’t be embarrassed it was funny.”

Alec was startled by the warm fingers peeling his hands away from his face, his heart ticking a little faster than before. “Okay, but please this stays between us. My sister would never let this down.” Alec smiled through his strained sigh.

Magnus grinned. God his smile was perfect Alec thought to himself. “Us, and the entire restaurant.” Alec watched Magnus pull his lip between his teeth trying to focus on his words.

“Speaking of, let’s get out of here.” Alec prompted standing up and going to pay.

“Alexander, let me pay.” Magnus tried but he really had no chance Alec was already bringing out his card.

“No, I’ve got it. I was the one who asked you out.” Alec refused and saw Magnus go to say something else but jumped in quickly “Please, I want to.”

“I was just going to say, fine.” Magnus paused meeting Alec and brushing his fingers gently along the top of his hand. “As long as I can pay next time.”

Alec couldn’t hold in the giant smile that grew on his face at the words next time.

“Deal.” Alec was feeling brave and linked his fingers with Magnus’ that were still currently brushing against his.

 

After dinner, they strolled back to the cinema hand in hand both in no rush for the night to end. Tonight had been amazing. Finally, he got to see the side to Magnus he had always wanted to. It felt a little surreal to be here in the brisk cold air talking nonsense with the most beautiful man he had ever laid eyes on. Alec could see the cinema lights approaching as they continued to walk. He didn’t want this night to end yet.

“You know, Alexander. I really can’t believe you haven’t seen the Harry Potter movies. I feel offended on their behalf.” Alec chuckled catching Magnus’ heart off guard. Magnus continued. “the fact that you work at the cinema and haven’t seen them makes it worse.”

“Hey, I didn’t say I would never watch them. Maybe I just need to watch them with the right person.” Alec shrugged innocently.

Magnus brushed his thumb along the cold skin of Alec’s hand. “And that person would be?”

“We’ll see.” Alec bit back his smile.

Magnus nudged Alec’s shoulder playfully.

Soon enough they finally reached the cinema doors and Alec came to a stop taking a second to take in Magnus’ warm smile one last time.

When both their eyes met a silent tension fell filling the air with unspoken feelings.

“I don’t want tonight to end.” Alec broke the silence looking down at their joined hands, not wanting to let go.

He hoped now that he had finally taken the first step with Magnus there would be many more moments like this one.

Magnus reached for Alec’s free hand with his. “I don’t want it to end either.” He smiled one side of his mouth quirking up more as he noticed the audience they had from inside the cinema. “But, I think we have an audience.” A light chuckle escaped his lips.

Alec turned his head and there they were both pretending to be deep in conversation but taking a few glances every few seconds. Rolling his eyes, he turned back to Magnus.

“Could I maybe, uh.” He paused clearing his throat. “Get your number?” His cheeks blushing a new shade of pink

“Of course.”

Alec pulled out his phone passing it to Magnus to add his contact. Everything felt so heightened now. He and Magnus it wasn't just some wishful thinking or pining. He was here standing in front of him.

“Thank you for the best night, darling.” Alec’s heart jumping again at the unexpected name.

Magnus passed back Alec’s phone. “I hate to leave you but I should let you get home, say hello to dear Izzy for me and the other lovely lady next to her.”

“I will.” Alec words falling on silence as they both stared at each other fighting the moment one of them would break away.

To Alec’s surprise, Magnus leant forward and placed a gentle kiss across Alec’s cheek, the heat inside him reaching a new level of hot. Which was sure to show on his face.

“Goodnight Alexander,” Magnus whispered pulling back feeling the tingle on his lips where he had kissed Alec. This was something special, that Magnus knew.

“Goodnight, Magnus.” Alec’s voice came out all raspy trying to gain somewhat cool he still had.

Magnus’ hand slipped from his as he walked away, yearning for so many more touches. The place where Magnus had kissed him still warm from his lips.

Taking a couple minutes to contain himself before he went inside he smiled to himself. Tonight really had been amazing.

As soon as he walked through the doors and walked closer to Maia and Izzy he was pulled from his haze “Now, that’s what I call a smile!” Maia exclaimed. Which only made him smile wider.

“Went that well huh?” Izzy prompted.

“it really did. Magnus is amazing.”

“I mean we could have told you that,” Maia smirked receiving one of Alec’s eye rolls.

Izzy came closer leaning over the counter. “So, details. Where’d you go? Did you kiss? Are you meeting up again?” Alec tried to catch up with all the questions being thrown at him.

“Firstly, we went to the sushi restaurant around the corner.” He couldn’t help but smile shaking his head at his stupid self-mistaking the wasabi for avocado. “No kiss. And I hope so, we exchanged numbers so yeah.”

“Alec, I haven’t seen you smile like this since ever. I’m really happy for you.” Maia replied.

“Same,” Izzy agreed. “I’m way too invested in my brothers love life.” Izzy sighed making Alec chuckle.

“You really are.”

“Anyway, let’s go. I’m exhausted.” Izzy grabbed her stuff followed by Maia.

“You can tell us more in the car.” Maia nudged his shoulder on their way out.

“Yeah, Yeah.” Alec rolled his eyes.


	5. Chapter 5

The next couple of weeks consisted of coffee dates, more shameless flirting at the movies and long chats over the phone. Alec never knew he could feel so happy in the presence of someone else but when he was around Magnus he found himself always smiling and looking forward to the next time he got to see him.

This was the first time he had been over to Magnus’ since they had started getting to know each other.

“I can’t believe you forced me into this.” Alec sighed curling Chairman in his lap a bit further. When Magnus said come over for a movie, a horror movie wasn’t exactly what Alec had in mind.

“In my defence, I didn’t know it was going to be this bad.” Magnus pleaded his case. Whoever recommended this to him he’d need to have a word. The only plus to this was he got to see his cat and Alec snuggled under a blanket that they kept stealing, which in turn turned into both of them fighting over the said blanket.

“Magnus, stop stealing the blanket.”

“It’s my blanket.” He said back trying to contain his smile as Alec looked back at him in a disapproving pout.

“You invited me, you’re supposed to be hospitable.”

Alec made a good point so in a moment of feeling brave Magnus moved closer wrapping the blanket around them evenly, noticing how Alec had stopped talking. Every time he felt like he and Alec were getting closer he would feel Alec go stiff making Magnus think he didn’t like it or want it. It was a shame as Magnus wants so much more with Alec. His feelings had only grown for the other man over the last couple of weeks.

Alec’s body went stiff the moment he moved closer. He didn’t know how to react. Magnus was so close and he just wanted to reach and link hands like they did back in the restaurant that night, but he didn’t know what was holding him back. So, instead of linking hands he moved his hand to chairman and continued to pat him.

“You know.” Magnus began. “I can’t believe he’s warmed to you so fast.” He continued patting the top of Chairman’s head. “He doesn’t even like Ragnor and I have known him a lot longer.” Magnus chuckled. It filled Magnus with a swirl of happiness watching his cat take to Alec so easily.

“Really? But he’s such a sweetie.” Alec found it hard to believe no one couldn’t like this lovable ball of fluff.

“Not to everyone.” Magnus let his eyes drift up to Alec’s face watching his dorky smile as he stared down at his cat. “I must say he has good taste.” Making Alec blush his favourite shade of pink.

Alec eyes flew up and found Magnus’ staring back at him. If he wasn’t careful he would find himself getting lost in those beautiful eyes.

Not wanting to stare too long and not wanting to make it awkward Alec quickly changed the subject, adverting his eyes to the tv screen they had both forgotten about. “You know when you asked me over for a movie I was kind of expecting it to be a Harry Potter one since you made such a big deal out of it when we first went out for dinner?”

“We can still watch one if you would like?” Magnus replied feeling a bit lost after staring at Alec for so long.

“I would like that, anything would be better than this lady terrifying people in the dark.” Alec chuckled relaxing slightly itching his hand closer to Magnus’ trying to find the courage to actually hold it.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know why I even chose a scary movie.” Magnus shook his head a little embarrassed.

Alec could see the doubt spreading across Magnus’ face and that’s not what he wanted at all. “Magnus, it’s okay. As long as that lady doesn’t attack me in the dark I’ll be okay.” He joked trying to lighten the mood.

“Shut up.” Magnus groaned throwing the nearest cushion at Alec disturbing dear Chairman who meowed in protest.

“You’ll protect me, right?” Alec continued still trying to get a smile on Magnus’ face.

“No.” Magnus sulked but Alec could see the smile pulling at his lips. “We’d protect each other,” Magnus spoke softly tugging at Alec’s heartstrings.

“We would.” Alec smiled back. “So, Harry Potter?” Alec prompted.

“yes, yes.” Magnus got up and changed the movie before coming back down and settling even closer to Alec.

They watched in silence for the next hour both enthralled with the movie until Alec broke the silence asking a question. “How did you come to love Harry Potter so much?”

Magnus thought about his answer. He trusted Alec, he did. But he didn’t want to see that look of pity in his eyes that everyone gave him when he was younger. “When I was little I never really got the chance to do much in the way of watch tv or movies growing up in the foster system. So, when I got older I gravitated to everything like that. I guess it was my way of escaping from my reality but also my memories. Harry Potter was the first movie series I really got invested in and brought a smile to my face every time a new movie got released.” Magnus followed with. “Sorry, I sound stupid. I just really like them.” He hated showing that side of himself the side many people don’t see. That under all the layers of colour and makeup was just a man struggling. 

“Hey,” Alec whispered, this time reaching for Magnus’ hand and holding it tight with no intention of letting it go. “Nothing you say is stupid.” Alec’s hand felt so calming and soft that Magnus was yet again surprised to feel so at ease whenever he opened up to him. When he looked up and saw Alec’s hazel eyes staring back at him he didn’t see pity he saw understanding, he saw kindness. Feeling a sudden urge to cry he held back his tears to hear what Alec had to say next.

“I understand. When I got older I struggled a lot with accepting myself. And the only thing that would take my mind off it was reading, I’d just get lost in a new world, someone else’s reality so I didn’t have to think about mine. So, It’s not stupid.” Alec smiled sweetly filling Magnus with something he hadn’t felt in a while and it shocked him.

Alec could see Magnus’ eyes begin to water after he finished talking. This moment to others they had shared felt different more open and emotional. One thing Alec took away from that moment was that he never wanted to be the cause of such a broken look. He wanted to continue to make him smile. He knew at that moment this thing with Magnus was something a lot deeper than he had realised.

Feeling the need to be close to Magnus, Alec pulled him in close and let him wrap his arms around him. Having Magnus this close was setting his heart at a new pace, but he liked it.

“Thank you,” Magnus whispered lifting his head from Alec’s shoulder and kissing him on the cheek briefly before settling back down.

He’d never get sick of the feeling it gave him when Magnus kissed his cheek. He wanted to cherish that feeling for as long as he could.

After that, they both relaxed in each other’s embrace enjoying the rest of the movie.

 

 

When Alec woke the next morning, he felt extra warm and a little snug wanting to stay in that warmth just a little longer he nuzzled in further to what he thought was his pillow but soon realised it was not. He was leaning on Magnus' shoulder. His heart almost jumped out of his chest. They must have fallen asleep on the couch together.

Forcing his eyes to stay shut a little longer he hoped Magnus would wake up soon and diffuse the situation with his nonchalant ways but that wasn’t going to happen anytime soon. After waiting 20 minutes or so he decided to try and pull himself from Magnus’ embrace but the minute he tried Magnus’ arms instinctively tightened around his waist stopping him from escaping.

Magnus was pulled from his deep and rather peaceful sleep by someone wriggling next to him. He knew it was Alec he could smell his cologne next to him. He could have let him leave but he was so warm and Magnus liked to snuggle. “No, stay,” Magnus grumbled turning in towards Alec.

Magnus’ words startled him for a second until he let himself just be in the moment and not over think. There was no use. So, surprising himself he snuggled back down and enjoyed Magnus’ warm arms wrapped around him.

Magnus couldn’t contain the smile on his face once Alec relaxed back down into his grasp.

“You’re like a cuddly teddy bear.” Magnus’ voice rasped still coming out of his sleep.

“Says the one who stopped me from moving.” Alec chuckled. Why did this all feel so easy yet terrifying all at once?

“Someone kicked the blanket off last night, I had to keep my source of warmth.” Magnus pulled at his lips with his teeth.

“How do you know that was me? You don’t have any proof.” Alec protested sliding his head up onto his palms looking up at Magnus.

Magnus bit back his smile. “Chairman told me.” Magnus’ smile only grew when he saw Alec roll his eyes. “That and you wriggle a lot in your sleep. It’s the only plausible answer.”

“Whatever,” Alec rolled his eyes again resting his head back down enjoying just being here with Magnus. Doing this all day instead of going to work would be ideal.

Shit! Work. He shot up so fast Magnus had a confused look on his face. “what time is it?”

Magnus checked his phone. “Just went past 10 am. What time do you have work?”

“11:30. That’s not enough time to get home and get ready, shit.” Alec cursed getting up from the couch.

Magnus followed. “Hey, it’s okay you can just shower here I’m sure I have some clothes that will fit you we aren’t that different in size,” Alec sighed a breath of relief. “You’re sure?” He asked.

“Yes,” Magnus smiled walking up to Alec. “I’ll make you some breakfast while you’re in there.”

Alec was so relieved he didn’t even realise he was doing it until it was too late he grabbed Magnus’ face and kissed him on the cheek. “Thank you.” Leaving Magnus feeling stunned, but wanting more.

Magnus cooked them both a couple of eggs with some bacon on the side and served it up just as Alec entered the kitchen looking and smelling very clean. Looking insanely attractive in his clothes, he was finding it hard not to stare.

“You look good.” Magnus made his opinion known.

Alec blushed a little under Magnus’ gaze, “You think?” To which he got a nod in return,

“Thank you for breakfast Magnus, it looks amazing.”

“You’re welcome.”

Magnus spoke again. “Hey, I was wondering if I could drop you off at work instead of you taking the subway?” He mused.

“Only if it’s no trouble?” Alec replied before eating a mouthful of food.

“I want to,” Magnus assured him.

‘Thank you.” Alec sent him one of the warm loving smiles that turned him into a mess.

“No thanks necessary, I just want to spend more time with you.” Alec’s smile only grew. “Eat up and then we will get going.”

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

Alec and Magnus walked hand in hand to the front door of the building, enjoying the comfortable quiet between them.

“So, I uh really enjoyed last night.” Alec stumbled his words always feeling a little on edge whenever he was around Magnus.

“Even the horror film?” Magnus chuckled leaning in further to Alec.

“Maybe that a little less, but ultimately it was really great.” Alec’s smile put the sun to shame. “Chairman was definitely the best part.” He teased.

“Oh, really?” Magnus scoffed feigning offence.

Alec nodded with a cheesy grin, “But you were a close second.” But really Magnus was it. He had forgotten what it felt like or sometimes even wondered if he had ever been this happy with someone. Getting know Magnus and every little thing about him excited him, he just wanted to dive deeper and experience it all.

“I guess that’s okay,” Magnus paused looking down to their joined hands. “For now.” It was something about the moment that made him feel off-kilter like he was starting to wait for something more between them, he wanted something more between them. What was growing between them, he knows it is special. It’s not every day someone like Alec lightwood comes into your life and sweeps you off your feet feeling things he had been terrified to feel for quite some time.  He could feel Alec’s warm smile’s and gentle touches slowly but surely be slipping through the cracks in his heart and mending them piece by piece.

This thing between them was a breath of fresh air that they both needed.

As the silence between them began to grow, Alec broke it. “I’ll drop your clothes off tomorrow. Thank you for lending them to me, and for everything basically.”

“No, no.” Magnus jumped in. “Keep them, they look better on you anyway.”

“I find that hard to believe.” Alec chuckled. Everything looked far better on Magnus and he was sure of it. “You’re sure?”

“Positive.” Magnus didn’t want to say goodbye but he could feel the time slipping away. “Now, you better get in there before I get you in trouble for being late.” Leaning forward he placed a small peck on Alec’s cheek before moving away.

“See you later, Magnus,” Magnus said another quick goodbye to Alec and eventually detangled their fingers that were still joined. Alec missed the warmth as soon as they were gone.

Walking through the door that morning he couldn’t wipe the smile off his face. He quickly got changed and joined Izzy behind the counter.

“I couldn’t help but notice those weren’t your clothes you were wearing when you came in and you definitely didn’t come home last night,” Izzy smirked while replacing the straws and napkins.

“I – uh, so?”

“Were they Magnus’?”

“Uh, yeah but it’s not-“ He got flustered.

“You don’t have to explain to me why you were in your boyfriend’s clothes, Alec.” She chuckled. “It’s cute,”

“Izzy, it’s not like that.” He was quick to correct her. “We’re not together like that.”

“Oh,” Izzy stopped looking genuinely surprised. “It’s just you two looked.” She paused. “Sorry, never mind.”

“I’m just enjoying getting to know him for now.” He added while turning his attention towards his phone that just pinged in his pocket.

 **Magnus Bane:** Have a good day, darling x

Alec’s heart skipped over the sweet message not even thinking twice before texting back

As Magnus made his way back up to his apartment he received a reply not even a couple of minutes later creating a smile on his lips

 **Alexander:** You too x


	6. Chapter 6

The night was busy, it always was on Friday night and most of the weekend. Normally he wouldn’t mind the busy atmosphere; His mind was somewhere else tonight entirely. Asking people the simple question of what movie they would like to see seemed like the hardest task right now. He had so many thoughts swimming around in his mind he couldn’t put one thought in front of the other. Working tonight was the last thing he wanted to be doing. Until Magnus walked in. Instantly hearing his voice from across the room. Somehow managing to make him smile even when they hadn’t said hello yet.

As soon as Magnus entered through the large doors to the cinema his eyes immediately found Alec, and something felt off. His eyes looked vacant like his thoughts were somewhere else entirely.

Ignoring whatever comment Raphael was making behind him he made his way to the counter.

“Hey, you”

“Hey, yourself.” Alec smiled back but it didn’t reach his eyes.

“You alright?” Magnus frowned getting a closer look at Alec’s tired expression. He looked like he hadn’t slept much.

“Yeah.” Alec brushed it off quickly not wanting to bother Magnus with his own personal dramas. “Just busy”

Magnus let it go, for now.

“So, what movie this time?”

 

 

After receiving his tickets from Alec, Magnus and his friends made their way to the movie theatre, but something was still annoying Magnus. He knew Alec from spending a lot of time with him over the past 3 weeks and he knew he wasn’t okay. Knowing Alec had a break soon he decided to skip the first part of the movie and go see him.

Alec ripped his apron off the minute his break had begun, starting to head out back he caught someone standing to the side of the counter. Magnus. Confused he walked closer. “Don’t you have a movie to see? I’m pretty sure it started 20 minutes ago.”

“Turns out I found something better to do. Want some company on your break?” Magnus waited to try to gauge what Alec was thinking hoping he didn’t misread the situation and have just left Alec alone.

“Oh,” Normally when he was feeling like this he would want to be alone, but this was Magnus and something about him just made everything feel easier.

“If you want me to of course,” Magnus added quickly hoping he wasn’t about to embarrass himself.

“I do,” Alec blurted out quickly after, maybe too quickly.

Magnus smiled with relief. “Lead the way.”

They walked through the doors and out to the back finding a spot on the concrete outside. If Magnus was unsure before he was certain now. Something definitely was up with Alec if the rather big sigh that left his lips was anything to go by.

Magnus shuffled closer to Alec only inches apart. “Wanna talk about it?”

Alec was startled by the question. How did Magnus even know something was wrong?

“Huh?” Slipped from his lips.

“I may not have known you long, but, I can tell when something is wrong.” He paused, his voice soft. “Do you want to talk about it? I can just listen?” He offered.

Exhaling and leaning his head against the brick wall, Alec gave in. He wasn’t okay, his mind had been at 150% all night he needed to talk about it with someone. He trusted Magnus, he felt safe. “My parents.”

“Your parents?”

“My mother called asking if we could all come around for a family dinner.” Alec paused already getting annoyed at the words “family” as if they had been one the past year. “The last time I saw them, let’s just say it was eventful.”

Magnus on impulse and extinct reached for Alec’s hand. “I guess things aren’t great between you then?”

“The last time I saw them was just over a year ago when I.” He paused choking on his words a flash of memory entering his mind. Their faces. Taking a deep breath, he continued. “When I came out to them.” Trying to hide the pain he chuckled quietly. “it didn’t exactly go well.”

Brushing his thumb across the top of Alec’s hand as an attempt to show comfort. “I’m sorry, Alexander.”

“Don’t be, I’ll be fine.” He tried to make himself believe it. “Izzy and Max will be there.” He paused “I’ll be fine.” He repeated.

Seeing Alec like this was harder than he would have ever expected. Seeing the man, he cares about deeply hurting. He just wanted to hold him in his arms but he had to settle for holding his hand not really knowing where they stand in all that.

“Well, if you need someone to talk to afterward or you just need to escape you know where I live. Or if you just want to talk on the phone, I’ll always answer.” He offered the only thing he knew he could which was as much support as Alec needed.

Alec briefly met Magnus’ eyes finding sincerity and honesty. It was a relief to know he had someone like Magnus in his life who was there at just the right time to make him feel okay.

When their eyes meet Magnus felt it again. Like something was hitting his heart creating small flutters, it was scary, it was terrifying like someone was recharging it, repairing it piece by piece. That someone being Alec. It made him feel uneasy at the thought that Alec could make him feel this strongly about him in such a short amount of time that it made him think just how fast he could shatter everything and more as well.

Alec felt like the moment between them froze briefly like they were both thinking. Alec wasn’t only thinking, he was feeling. He had no idea if what he was feeling was reciprocated but what he did know was this, what Magnus made him feel was the closest thing he had ever felt to being in love.

“thank you,” Alec broke the moment with a soft whisper.

“So,” Magnus snapped out of his thoughts. “When is the dinner?”

“Tomorrow.” Alec groaned smacking his head a little too hard against the wall behind him receiving a disapproving look from Magnus. “why?” He asked.

“I have tomorrow off work and was going to ask you around but it’s okay, we can just do it another time.”

“Trying to get me around for another horror movie?” Alec laughed properly for the first time that day.

“What if I was?” Magnus laughed back. “Maybe I just wanted another cuddle.” As soon as the words were out he panicked for a second. He did not mean to say that out loud. But Alec just laughed.

“I thought I wriggle too much?”

“I can learn to live with it.” Magnus shrugged pretending to act like he was completely cool after. “No, but seriously, no horror movie next time.”

“You know,” Alec paused adjusting his grip on Magnus’ hand. “I’d much rather spend the night with you than with my family.”

“I know.” Magnus smiled looking down at their joined hands.

“But, I think the longer I delay this dinner the worse it will get. Rain check for another time?”

“Of course, and many times after I hope?”

“I’d like that.” Alec had noticed that just in this little time of talking with Magnus he already felt so much better. If only he could bring Magnus to the dinner to ease his nerves. That would definitely go down well. That was the dream, to bring someone home to his family, that person now had a face and name, Magnus. Magnus was his dream now.

They both just sat enjoying the comfortable quiet between them.

“Hey, Alec your break is ---- Oh Magnus hey.” Izzy appeared from the door behind them.

“Hello, Isabelle.” He smiled.

Magnus noticed how fast Alec withdrew his hand from his. Like he didn’t want anyone to see. It hurt, he wasn’t going to lie.

“Sorry to ruin the moment but, Alec your break is over.” Izzy smiled apologetically.

“Thanks, Iz, I’ll be right in.”

When Izzy went back inside Alec turned to Magnus quickly. “Thank you, for listening.” He wanted to say more but couldn’t find the right words.

“Anytime, darling.” Magnus missed the warmth of Alec’s hands already. “Remember what I said. If you need to talk please don’t hesitate to reach out to me.”

“I won’t.”

“I should get back to the movie I have already missed half of.” Magnus laughed getting up and walking towards the entrance. “See you later, Alexander.”

 

* * *

 

“Alec stop stressing, I’m sure it will be okay. Mum sounded different on the phone this time. Like she missed us.” Izzy tried but it wasn’t helping at all. He missed his mother too but it didn’t take away from the fact that when he needed her she wasn’t there.

It had just been over a year. A year since he let himself be really who he was, A year since he told his parents that he was gay. A year since he was shot down in a second, he still remembers the looks in their eyes like they didn’t recognize him anymore. He still remembers the deafening silence that lingered throughout the whole room, the tension that surrounded him and his lungs. The tight feeling in his chest, his heart slowly sinking down and letting his ribs cave in around it. He remembers it all and all the hurt he felt afterward.

If Izzy wasn’t right there next to him, he didn’t know how he would have made it through that night. Her comforting touches grounding him and not letting him slip away. Her sweet words “you always have me” that night when they went home. And he really did have her. She was like his sister and best friend in one. He treasured her love and friendship. She kept him strong in moments of weakness.

“It’s just been a while, and I just don’t want to see that same look in her eyes.” Sighing into his hands he wished Magnus was here, he always made him feel calmer. “I’ll be fine.” He tried telling himself again for the millionth time.

“You’re right you will be fine. You have me and Max right beside you.”

“The only reason I’m even going” He chuckled he hadn’t seen his little brother in 6 months. “thanks, Izzy.” He added.

It was still a few minutes before they arrived at their parent's house when his phone chimed with a text notification. Finding himself immediately smiling the minute he realized it was Magnus.

**Magnus Bane:**

**Hope your dinner goes well, you know you’ve got me if you need. Me and chairman will miss you on movie night ;(**

 

“I swear your eyes turn into literal hearts when he texts you, it’s adorable.” Alec blushed, he couldn’t help it. Magnus just had that effect on him.

“Shut up and keep your eyes on the road.” He rolled his eyes but not being able to hide the smile he still had from Magnus’ text.

Another text message came through. A picture of Chairman snuggled up on Magnus’ lap while Magnus himself sported a rather cute pout.

No one had to know that he saved the picture.

“I seriously can’t believe you two aren’t together yet. You already act like a couple.”

“We are just really good friends, I don’t want to rush anything, I don’t want to mess this up he’s too important to me.” Ever since Magnus came into his world he couldn’t imagine one without him.

“I know Alec, but, eventually you’ll take the next step, right?” She paused. “You don’t want to lose your chance. Not when you two just click like that.” She was right, and he knew she was. But it would be his first proper relationship that he really felt something for, he just wanted to take his time.

“Izzy it’s only been a month.”

“I know, I’m just saying you don’t have to hold back anymore. Go for what you want.” He wasn’t holding back? Was he? “I can tell Magnus adores you so don’t over think things?”

“Thanks, Iz,” Alec said as they pulled into their parent's driveway.

He quickly sent a text back to Magnus.

**I’ll miss you too. Maybe chairman a little more.**

**From Magnus Bane: Well in that case maybe next time I’ll give you and my dear cat some alone time, as much as it would wound my ego.**

Alec laughed stepping through the doors of his parents.

“What’s got you laughing hmmm? A boyfriend maybe?” Alec’s eyes went wide of all things he thought his mother would say, it wasn’t that. He quickly looked to Izzy finding the same expression on her face.

“I uh- no, no just a friend.” He managed to find some words.

“It’s okay, Alec you can tell me.” His mother smiled at him. He was so confused. Why was she being so nice? Maybe she did want to reconcile?

“He’s really just a friend.” Because that’s what Magnus was at the moment. Just his friend.

“If you say so,” His mother gave in. “Foods already on the table. Let’s go eat”

He and Izzy shared confused glances on their way through.

“Hey Maxie,” Alec smiled, walking over and bending down to hug him

“No one has called me Maxie since I was 12.” Max huffed,

Alec laughed. “That was 6 months ago.”

“So.”

Alec rolled his eyes. “Can I get a hug from my favorite brother or not?”

“I’m your only brother,” Max added. Just as Alec was about to give up Max stopped him and found him in his arms.

Alec almost was brought to tears. He really had missed his little brother. This past year had been hard being separated from his family.

Once seated Alec looked around but couldn’t see his father anywhere. “Where’s dad?” He asked noticing how his mother tensed at his words.

“He couldn’t make it tonight so it’s just us 4 for the evening.” She smiled and pretended everything was fine but Alec knew his mother. He was a lot like her in that way he would cover up his pain and pretend he was okay for the sake of the people who were around him.

He decided to drop it for now.

“So,” She started. “How’s work you two?” She asked Izzy and himself.

“Work’s good, not much to really tell.” He replied. Izzy following with something similar.

“And how’s your study going, Alec?” His mother added.

“Good, I dropped to part-time study so I’m not constantly running to and from the both of them.”

They continued to talk more during the night, but he could tell something was up with his mother. She wasn’t happy.

“Mum.” Alec stopped her mid-sentence. “I can tell something is wrong. What is it?”

He knew the second she sighed sounding so defeated she had given up trying to pretend. “I wanted to try and delay this as much as possible, but I should have known you would see through it.” She chuckled lightly.

“what is it, mum?” Izzy reached out her hand to her.

“Me and your father, we aren’t together anymore. Haven’t been for a while.” She finally said.

So that’s why he wasn’t here.

“Did something happen between you two?” He asked hoping not to overstep he just wanted to make sure his mother was okay.

“Alec I-“ Her pausing only confirmed for him that it wasn’t good. “Your father was having an affair.” He heard Izzy gasp from across the table.

Alec was shocked he never thought his father would do something like that to his mum. He was glad he wasn’t here not knowing how he would react around him.

“Bastard” Izzy snapped shuffling closer to their mum. Max doing the same.

Getting up from his seat he went and brought his mother into his arms. “I’m sorry Mum.” He said as he held her tight.

This was their first hug in over a year. There was worry it would be awkward but all they shared for each other was love and forgiveness.

“It’s okay, Alec. I’m okay.” She said as he pulled away. She seemed more sad than angry but Alec, on the other hand, all he felt was anger towards him.

Maryse held Alec’s gaze “Alec, can we talk? Just the two of us?” She gestured to the lounge behind them.

Alec felt his body go stiff. Unsure as to why she would want to talk to him privately. He followed anyway sitting down next to her.

“So, what do you want to talk about?” Alec asked worried as to what he would get back in response.

“I want to apologize.” She smiled at him with her eyes holding nothing but pure genuine honesty.

“For what?” Alec frowned.

“For not being there when you needed me. When you came out to us.”

Alec swallowed the lump that had formed. His heart racing faster than before. “Oh.” Was all he could manage to say back.

“When you told us, I was caught off guard, I didn’t know how to react. I didn’t say anything when I should have. I could see the stress in your eyes, yet I didn’t say anything. I wasn’t there for my son when you needed me most and it kills me to this day knowing you think I didn’t accept and still love you for you.” Her voice started to waver.

Alec had dreamed of this moment. Of his mother finally accepting him and loving him. But nothing could prepare him for what he was feeling right now. This was all he had ever wanted to hear.

“I want you to know. I never once judged you and honestly, I should have reached out to you sooner, but I was just scared you would still hate me.” She sighed.

Alec reached for her hands. “Mum, I’d never hate you.”

“Maybe not, but I hated myself for not telling you then and there that it didn’t matter who you fell in love with. I’d still always love you, my boy.” Tears had started to fall from her eyes. “All I want for you and the other’s is to be happy. That’s all I have ever wanted for my children.”

“I have missed so much of your life over past year and I miss you, Alec, so much. I love you and I’m so sorry for making you think that I didn’t approve. The only thing that matters to me is that you stay Alec. The man you are, my Alec.”

He couldn’t speak, his heart slowly lightening as he felt the weight that had been holding him down for the past year slowly lift.

Pulling his mother in for hug he let the tears he had been holding fall as he felt her hand caress in circles over his back. This, his mother, he had her back.

“I love you too, Mum.” They both just stayed in each other’s embrace for what felt like forever. This was what they needed.

Eventually pulling himself from his mother he saw a hint of teasing in her eyes.

“So, if this man you are texting makes you happy. You should bring him around for dinner one night. I’d love to meet the man who makes my Alec smile like no other.” Alec blushed under her words.

The idea of Magnus meeting his family was very daunting. But he had thought about it. His dream of introducing the man of his dreams to his family actually felt like it could fit into reality.

“He does make me happy, really happy.” He sighed just thinking about Magnus made him happy. “But we are just friends right now, I don’t want to rush what we have. It’s too important to ruin, I don’t want to mess up and lose him.”

“I understand, but don’t leave it too long.” She smiled. “I haven’t seen you smile like that in years. I’d still love to meet him even if he is just your _friend_.” She smirked.

Alec chuckled it was so strange for his mother to be interested in his love life. “I’ll think about it.”

The rest of the night went well, but all he could think about was going to see Magnus and telling him all about tonight.

 

 

It was almost past 10 when Magnus finally began to make dinner. He had the night off work but ended up doing paperwork anyway. He needed a distraction to take his mind off Alec. He couldn’t help but worry about the man. He had seen his face the other night the look of fear of the unknown the worry that he wouldn’t be able to handle it.

Alec was strong, Magnus knew he would be fine, but he still worried. He cared about him it was only in his nature to worry about him.

As he stirred his pasta he thought about texting said man but wasn’t sure if he would want him to. He hadn’t heard from him since earlier in the night.

Trying to ease his own tensions about the night he poured himself a glass of wine and tried not to ponder on it too much. Izzy was there, his younger brother Max was there he had a support system, he wouldn’t need him. But apart of him wished he would be there with him just to hold his hand and assure him everything was going to be okay.

He was getting ahead of himself. The mere thought of meeting Alec’s family was a very distant dream he wasn’t sure would ever come true.

Shaking off his thoughts he turned the stove off and went to grab a bowl from his cupboard but was stopped in his tracks by a knock at the door.

Who would be here this late? He thought, seeing as it was almost 10:30.

Making his way to the door he noticed chairman making his way to the door as well which he never did. Puzzled by his cat’s actions he continued to the door.

When he opened the door, he was pleasantly surprised to see Alec standing there. At least that explained Chairman. He almost felt threatened by Alec and his cat’s relationship.

“Alexander, I wasn’t expecting you this late.” He wasn’t expecting him, but he was very happy he did show up.

Alec was standing in front of him, he didn’t look sad or angry, but, he didn’t look happy either. There was definitely something turning in that brain of his.

“You, umm, you said I could---” Alec said starting to feel stupid for even coming over to Magnus’ this late.

“I meant what I said, Alec. I just wasn’t expecting you this late. But, please come in I’m happy you did stop by.” Magnus could see he was nervous, he had no need to be. He’d always appreciate Alec’s company.

Alec nodded trying to hide his half smile as Magnus’ words made their way through his mind.

As Alec made his way through the door Magnus couldn’t help but take a quick appreciative glance at Alec’s attire. All black as he usually went for, but he definitely made black look good.

Alec continued through to the kitchen and stopping at the bench. “Magnus, you haven’t had dinner yet?” He asked.

“I got completely sidetracked with paperwork, I know it’s bad.” Magnus made his way over to the cupboard bringing out a bowl, briefly turning around to offer Alec one to which he declined.

After filling his bowl with pasta, he placed it down at the table almost forgetting to offer Alec a drink. “Would you like anything to drink?” Alec shook his head declining again.

In the time-space that Alec entered his home, he had only said one sentence to him, it was starting to worry him. Alec was fidgety, his eyes continuously looking around like he didn’t know where to place them.

“Alexander, what’s wrong?” Magnus spoke softly making sure he didn’t startle him.

“huh? Oh nothing, it's nothing.” Magnus didn’t believe him.

“I don’t believe you, but if you don’t want to talk about it I won’t push.” It’s not that he didn’t want to talk about it per say. It was just that he didn’t really know where to place his emotions. He was overwhelmed with the whole night's events.

“Magnus, I” He paused thinking his next words carefully. “So much happened tonight I just don’t know where to start.”

Magnus moved from his seat and came and sat next to him.

“Start with the first thing that comes to mind, doesn’t matter what order it is in, all that matters, is that you say what you want to say.” Alec couldn’t fathom how Magnus was so understanding. He never got tired of his useless rambling and jumbling thoughts. He could tell Magnus was genuine with his words, his eyes saying it all.

So, he said the first thing that was on his mind. “mum and I talked.”

Magnus wasn’t sure if it was a good thing, so he just let him continue.

“She apologized.” Alec let a faint smile form on his lips. “She told me she never once judged me, and that she shouldn’t have stayed quiet she was just caught off guard. She told me that all she wants for me is to be happy and that she will love me no matter what.” Alec still had chills from remembering her words creating an overwhelming swell of emotions circle his heart.

Magnus could see the relief in Alec’s eyes as he talked like the past year he had been carrying all this hurt and now, now he could let it all go. So, when he saw tears slide down his cheeks he knew exactly why and just pulled him into his embrace letting him feel this for himself. “That’s amazing, Alexander.” Magnus had to fight back his own tears.

Alec felt so at home in Magnus arm’s he didn’t want to pull back, but eventually, he did wiping at his eyes. “Sorry,” He apologized. He felt exposed and raw, all his emotions on display.

Magnus brought his hand up to his face wiping the last few stray tears that were lingering on his skin. “Never apologize for something like this,” Magnus smiled. “Okay?”

Alec nodded taking a deep sigh. “I wish this was all that happened tonight.”

“What do you mean?”

“My father wasn’t there tonight. Mum told us he had been having an affair and that they’re getting a divorce.” Alec added. “So, it’s just frustrating because I want to feel this happiness this relief but it’s being ruined by this anger towards my father for doing this. I could tell it really affected my mother more than she let on, I just wish I could take that pain away.” He still couldn’t believe his father would do that to her. The mother of his 3 children. It made him sick.

“I’m sorry.” Magnus really didn’t know what else to say. “if you are anything like your mother I know she must be a strong woman and with the support of her children she will get through it.” She was a strong woman and Alec always admired her for her strength.

“You’re right,” Alec smiled. “And we will be there for her.”

“I know you will be.”

Alec chuckled briefly remembering what his mother said to him at the end of their conversation.

“What’s so funny?” Magnus asked smiling, finding Alec’s laugh contagious.

“It’s nothing really it’s just.” He paused. “She wants to meet you and have you around for dinner.” Alec shook his head with embarrassment.

“Really?” Magnus asked pleasantly surprised. Had Alec talked about him?

“Yeah.” Alec was blushing now.

Magnus couldn’t hide his smile anymore. This made him happier than he thought it would. “I’d love that.” He chimed. “But only when you want me to.”

Magnus meeting his mother filled his brain. His mother being overly eager to know him and pester him with questions made him laugh. As embarrassing as it might end up being it was definitely something he wanted in the near future. “I’d like it too.”

Alec stayed for another hour after that just enjoying Magnus’ company.

Magnus walked him to the door, sad to see him leave but excited to see him again. “Goodnight, Alexander. Text me when you get home safe.”

Alec stopped at the door. “Goodnight, see you next Friday?” He asked but secretly wanting to see him sooner.

“You will indeed, if not sooner.” Magnus pecked him on the cheek and finally let him leave.

Closing the door after he left he sighed against the wooden frame. It was getting harder to control his feelings around Alec. He just wanted to be with him. Being friends was fine, he loved it but a massive part of him was screaming for more but the only thing he could do was trust that in time it would happen.

The minute Magnus closed the door behind him he couldn’t help but touch the place where Magnus kissed his cheek. The more time he spent with Magnus the more he got to know him and the more each kiss meant something to him. It made him imagine what kissing him on the lips would feel like.


	7. Chapter 7

Magnus had the day off and for the first time didn’t have anything to do and found himself sitting in his lounge feeling extremely bored. He thought about possibly going to see Alec for lunch, it had been a few days since he had seen him, and text messages weren’t a good replacement, only making him miss him more.

Grabbing his keys and his wallet he headed out.

 

Stopping by a small café on the way he grabbed a couple of sweet treats to eat with their lunch and continued onto the cinema.

It felt strange feeling this excited about seeing someone again, although this wasn’t just anyone, this was Alec.

Getting out of the car he couldn’t contain his smile, with every step forward it really hit him just how much he really missed him. That glowing smile that would light up a room, his beautiful hazel eyes always looking at him so intently. The tiny giggle that would pass his lips when feeling shy, making his eyes crease at the corners. His soft fluffy hair always managing to look slightly different each day. The rasp of his voice whenever he said hello, making Magnus want to hang onto every word that left his mouth.

God help him, he had it bad.

Entering through the doors, he found at least one familiar face. “Hey, Isabelle.” He said as he walked up to the counter.

“Oh, hey Magnus,” She sounded surprised to see him here. “What brings you here on a Wednesday morning of all times.”

“Is Alec around?” He asked suddenly feeling shy.

Izzy laughed like she should have known that was coming. “And here I thought you were coming to see a movie, silly me.” She teased.

Magnus found himself blushing, why was he blushing? He never blushed. “I wanted to take him out to lunch.” His heart was beating at a rather fast pace, what was happening to him? Why was he so nervous? He blamed Izzy and for the way she was looking at him like she knew all his secrets, not that he had many.

Izzy aw’d out loud clutching at her heart. She had a flair for the dramatic, he liked that. “That’s so sweet.”

Magnus couldn’t contain his smile. “So, is he here?”

“Oh, sorry no he’s not, he’s home sick.”

“Sick? For how long?”

Izzy paused looking him over like she was finally figuring him out, he felt exposed under her gaze. “You really care about him, don’t you?”

Magnus shrugged feeling a little uneasy at how good she was at this, was he that obvious? Magnus mentally rolled his eyes, _of course he was._

Izzy seemed to let that pass as an answer and continued. “He’s been sick since last night, but I’m sure he would love a visit.”

“Are you sure? I mean If he’s resting I don’t want to disturb him.” He asked chewing at his bottom lip. 

Izzy laughed, was what he said funny? “I can almost be 100% sure that he would love a visit,” Magnus found himself blushing again.

“Okay, I’ll do that, thanks, Izzy.”

Alec woke with a throbbing head, sore throat, and blocked nose, he could barely breathe let alone get out of bed. To put it bluntly, he felt like shit. He never got sick, this just doesn’t happen to him. He wanted the next few days to pass quickly, hating every minute of this.

A few hours after waking up he managed to make his way to the couch flopping his body down and regretting it immediately after, his head screaming at him for it. There was nothing interesting on the tv but left it playing on in the background anyway hoping somehow, he could drown out some of the aches he felt in his muscles.

He was dozing off and on trying and struggling to breathe through his nose when a knock at his door startled him sending a pain straight to his head wanting to crucify whoever was on the other side of that door. He briefly thought about ignoring it all together and just going back to sleep, but his better judgment got the best of him and he found himself dragging his tired limbs to the door.

Seeing Magnus on the other side, all his past thoughts went flying out the window. “Magnus,” He said, his voice dry and phlegmy.

Alec looked exhausted when he opened the door. His eyes glassed over and red, his nose all stuffy and blocked, and yet he still found him the most attractive man he had seen. His little pout on his lower lip doing it for him.

“Hey, you,” Magnus smiled, walking past Alec. “I heard you were sick, so I brought supplies.”

How did Magnus know he was sick?  

“Chicken soup, movies, tissues, and well most importantly my company, if you want it.” Magnus had an unsure look on his face after he said that and Alec smiled finding it amusing, why wouldn’t he want his company?

Magnus had done all this for him. He needed someone to pinch him to make sure it was all real.

Realising he hadn’t yet answered Magnus, he quickly replied. “I’d love you to stay, just don’t get too close, I don’t want you getting sick as well.” Did he just imagine it or did Magnus just pout?

“So, no cuddling on the couch?” Yup, that was a pout. “How boring.”

“If you get sick don’t blame me.” Alec chuckled giving in and not being able to say no to those beautiful dark brown eyes. His chuckle soon turned into a mess of croaking and coughing, reminding him just how awful he felt.

“Aw, darling.” Magnus stepped closer, caressing down his arm. His hands felt so warm, he just wanted them to wrap around him. “Go sit down and I’ll bring everything over and then we can get comfy for the rest of the day.”

They settled on the couch shortly after, a blanket nestled around them both as they sat and ate their soup.

“Thank you for all this, you didn’t have to do any of this you know.”

“I know, but I wanted to.”

“How did you know I was sick in the first place?” Alec asked

“Well, I went into your work hoping to get you on your lunch break and take you out for some food, but Izzy told me you were home and not well.” Alec felt a small flutter in his heart rise, a coy smile growing on his lips. Feeling bold, he linked their hands.

“You were going to take me out for lunch?”

“Yes,” Magnus chuckled, his hand tightening around his. “Believe It or not I like to do nice things for the people who mean a lot to me, and well, you mean more than most.”

Magnus shocked himself with his own confession, it wasn’t that he didn’t already know that, but the fact that he said it out loud, to Alec.

Alec circled his thumb across Magnus’ skin sending shivers up his arm. “You mean a lot to me too,” It fell silent as Magnus tried to ground himself from moving forward and kissing him then and there, but their first kiss would not be like this. “I missed you.” Alec’s confession was sweet and quiet and only made Magnus want to kiss him more.

He settled for saying the words back, scared at how they would sound. “I missed you too.” He swallowed the lump that formed in his throat and tried to push away the butterflies that were swirling around in his stomach, but with the way Alec was looking at him, that wasn’t going to happen anytime soon.

They were just staring at each other, like neither of them wanted to pull away. What was this between them? This feeling he felt, he knew what it was but didn’t know if he was ready to admit it to himself yet, not knowing at all if Alec felt the same or as strongly as he did. If he could he would have stayed like that all day just taking in every feature of his beautiful face, he’d watch the rise and fall of his chest, the flutter of his eyelashes as he blinked, he’d memorize the feel of his fingers tracing patterns into his skin. He’d take it all in and hold it close to his heart. It was a perfect moment, one he hoped would turn into many more as they grew closer together.

Suddenly Alec ripped his head away from Magnus, a sneeze erupting from his nose.

Alec had no idea why Magnus would want to be around him like this, all stuffed and blocked up, sneezing every few minutes, but he was here and seemed to have no intention of leaving as he got up and put the first movie on, settling back down next to him.

Halfway through the movie, Magnus heard soft snores coming from next to him. Alec was leaning against him with his head bent to the side, not quite resting against his shoulder, he looked out to the world. He couldn’t help but notice how uncomfortable the position must be him and decided to move him laying his head gently across his lap. Alec stirred a little from the movement but settled again as Magnus began to card his fingers through his hair slowly.

Magnus wanted so much more of this, just them and no one to disturb them.

The feelings that overcame Magnus while letting his gaze fall over Alec, it was overwhelming, everything feeling like it was about to burst from his chest.  He almost let the words slip from his mouth but quickly stopped himself. If he was ever going to say those words to Alec he wanted him to be awake.

The door opening and closing brought his thoughts to an immediate stop scared someone would hear them.

Izzy walked in her eyes going to straight to Alec in his lap, but this time her smile wasn’t teasing, it was sweet like what she saw made her happy like she was admiring what she saw in front of her.

“Hey,” He whispered. His fingers still carding through Alec’s soft locks.

“Hey,” She smiled back. “How long has he been out?”

Time must have got away on him, “About an hour,” Had he really been lost in his thoughts for that long?

Izzy sat down in the chair across from them, still looking at the scene in front of her, he could tell she was hesitating, thinking twice about whether she wanted to say what she was thinking.

It was quiet for another beat or two until she finally spoke. “You’re good for him.”

“Good?” Magnus asked confused.

“Yes, good. Great even.” She shuffled in the chair getting in a better position. “Before he met you, I wouldn’t say he was exactly shy or anything, but I could always tell there was some small part of him that was struggling with himself, struggling to accept who he really was, not even just with his sexuality, but with everything. It was always the small things, I’d see him just watch and observe from the sidelines. But, now, I don’t know he seems more carefree like not so much is holding him down.” As she talked Magnus kept looking down briefly not being able to take his eyes off him.

Izzy continued. “I guess some of that has to do with our mother and her finally being honest with us, but I also think it has to do with you, there’s something about you that brings out this thing in Alec I have never seen. The smile he has when he’s around you, I have always wanted to see him smile that way. You make him laugh, and you listen. You’re the first person he wants to see when he needs someone to talk to, and I’m just really glad he has someone like you in his life.”

Magnus felt this sudden urge to cry, finding that everything Izzy was saying, Alec had the same effect on him.

It was hard for him to believe what she was saying. Did he really have that effect on him? He looked down at Alec’s sleeping form, his eyelids still closed.

“I still remember the way his face lit up the first day you walked into the cinema,” Izzy added, his memories taking him back there. Remembering the minute, he was greeted by this tall ethereal man his life changed forever. He remembers the feeling he got when he smiled at him for the first time and had thought to himself it was unfair for one human to possess so much beauty, not even just in looks but as a person.

“His smile is rather beautiful.” He murmured to himself saying it before he even registered what was coming out of his mouth. “The way I feel about him,” He paused unsure why he was opening up to Alec’s sister while he was sleeping in his lap, but he felt at ease to do so, so continued. “It’s scary.”

“Something so real always scares us at first, because we don’t want to lose it, or ruin it somehow.” He couldn’t help but think how right she was, he was terrified to lose him, afraid that if he tried taking that next step with him, he would get rejected and, in the process, lose a friend he had come to love.

Izzy continued. “I know you’re scared, but please don’t let that fear dictate how you are with him. You both deserve to be happy. Don’t keep him at arm’s length just because it feels safe there.” He could hear in her words how protective she was of Alec. How she only wanted what was best for him, and he felt the same. Except, he was also trying to protect himself.

He had used that word for the last 5 years, using it as an excuse as to why he never pursued anything with anyone beyond a few dates, he used it as a coping mechanism to keep his heart free of pain, to not let anyone too close. But Alec, he was different.

Every time he told his heart to stop, it wouldn’t listen and at first it was slow, just every week, that smile, the laugh, the soft eyes, it would chip at the wall he’d built, small knocks at a time, and then it happened all at once. He wasn’t even sure when it happened. It could have happened when they first went out for dinner, or when they accidentally spent the night in each other’s arms, or the night he and Alec talked about his parents. He had no idea when or how Alec made his way into his heart so easily, but now that he was there, he never wanted him to leave, feeling that if he did, there would just be a massive hole left in his place.

“I don’t plan to go anywhere as long as he doesn’t.” He said the first honest thing he could think of without giving too much away.

“Good,” She rested back in her chair. “So, what are you two watching?” He had completely forgotten there was a movie playing in the background.

Tossing her the DVD case he watched her smile in surprise. “I love these movies.”

“Thank god, when Alec told me he hadn’t seen them I was shocked.” He laughed

“Yeah, for a guy who works at the cinema he’s not exactly a movie buff is he.” She chuckled back. “So you’re making him watch all the Harry Potter movies then?”

“I am, but unfortunately I think we will have to watch this one again once he is better.” He smiled down at Alec as his nose twitched.

Bringing his hand to his head he couldn’t help but notice just how hot his head was, he was burning up.

“Yeah, he doesn’t exactly look insanely interested in the movie at the moment.” Izzy teased, but soon saw Magnus’ concerned expression. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, I think he’s getting a fever.”

“It’s cute how you’re so worried about him.” Magnus rolled his eyes at that and cursed the blush he felt crawl up his back.

“I can’t help it okay.” He mumbled back. “I know of some good flu medication you can get from the store to take his fever down, I might go down quickly and get some.”

“Oh god,” Izzy chuckled. “You really have it bad, even going to get him medicine, you two are practically married already.”

“I’m just doing what I would do for any of my friends.” He protested but really, he hadn’t done this for anyone but Alec.

“Mhm, sure.” Izzy teased back. “No, I’m kidding, that’s actually really sweet of you.”

“I just have to figure out how to move without waking him.” He sat there trying to think of different ways but decided that they were all just as bad as each other and decided to just get it over with. Lifting his head gently he slid out from beneath him resting his head back down on a soft cushion. Thinking he was in the clear he went to stand up but felt a hand rest on his arm.

“Where are you going?” Alec was still half asleep and was stirred awake by Magnus moving him. He didn’t want him to leave yet. Not just because he was comfy, he didn’t exactly get a chance to really talk to him today. But god his head was sore he could barely keep his eyes open.

“Hey, sleeping beauty,” Magnus whispered. “I’m just going to get you something for your fever, I’ll be back in a little bit.” He kissed him softly on his forehead. “Is that alright?” He asked running his fingers through his hair.

“I guess so,” He smiled as he felt Magnus’ lips against his head, he could have sworn his headache disappeared for that one small second.

“See you soon.” As soon as Magnus was gone he missed him already.

“Cute pout big bro.” When did Izzy get here? Was she here the whole time?

“Shut up.” He rubbed at his sore eyes.

“It’s cute.”

Alec groaned, “How long have you been here?”

“Enough to see you snuggled up in your boyfriend’s lap.”

 

Magnus had forgotten his wallet and was making his way back to the lounge and stopped in his tracks when he heard. “He’s not my boyfriend.” Spill from Alec’s lips. The sharp sting of the words hurting more than he thought.

It wasn’t the fact that they weren’t together it was the way Alec had said it, annoyance in his voice like he was sick of hearing such a thing…. Magnus swallowed trying to push away his next thought, but it wasn’t going anywhere. It had sounded like it was the last thing he wanted.

Trying to push away the well in his throat he continued forward to grab his wallet. “I’m just.” But his voice betrayed him, and it came out all broken and raspy. “I forgot my wallet.” Grabbing it quickly he left before he could hear what Alec had to say next.

“Magnus, I uh.” But he was gone.

Magnus had looked hurt, the break in voice confirming that. Had Alec done that? Of course, he had, he always fucks everything up. Would he even come back now? If he were Magnus he wouldn’t.

Groaning he flopped his face down into the pillow Magnus had placed there for him and regretted it the second he had done it, his head throbbing with every movement.

“Sorry, I feel like that was my fault,” Izzy replied looking guilty.

“It’s not. It’s mine.” Grabbing his phone, he pulled up Magnus’ name and started typing out a text.

“Alec, what are you doing?”

“Texting him, I don’t want him to think I don’t want him here or something.” Everything was easier when he was around. “Iz,” He said sighing. “How am I supposed to make this not awkward when he gets back.” Before she got a chance to answer someone’s phone dinged on the coffee table.

It was Magnus’, he would have to come back anyway, a wave of relief fell over him. But it was quickly gone with the thought of trying to come back from what just happened.

“Maybe just talk to him?”

“You mean like talk _talk_ to him?” Izzy laughed at him.

“Yes, you doofus. Tell him how you feel for once.” Alec frowned at her offense written all over his face.

“I tell him how I feel.” He exclaimed.

Izzy snorted. “Alec, I hate to tell you this but calling him your friend and telling him you miss him, doesn’t count as telling him how you _actually_ feel about him.”

“I tell him other stuff.” He protested.

“Like?” Izzy prompted. “Cause telling me how you feel about him doesn’t count.”

Alec stuttered out some form of a reply, but it wasn’t really coherent.

“Fine,” Alec sighed growing tired of this conversation. “Maybe I haven’t exactly told him how I feel but I don’t want to tell him while I’m sick.”

“Maybe not, but I’m sure there is some small way you can show him you like him or appreciate him today without saying the words ‘I like you’”

“Maybe,”

“Anyway, I have to go, I’m having dinner with Simon.” Izzy smiled getting up from her seat. “Try and enjoy the rest of your night.” She paused briefly. “And Alec, tell him, if not today, another day.”

“I will.” He would.

 

 

The whole way to the store he couldn’t shake the feeling he had when he left Alec’s apartment. He felt stupid for feeling so hurt when he had no right to. They weren’t together and had never even talked about ever getting together, but maybe that was the problem, they had never talked about it so all he was doing was constantly guessing. Guessing how Alec felt, assuming he felt the same? that maybe this, whatever this was between them would go somewhere. He felt stupid for letting his heart open again. He felt stupid for letting his heart love again.

He was in love with him. And Alec didn’t love him back.

Making his way through the store he tried to forget about it all, he could think about this later, not now.

 

 

It felt like Magnus had been gone for hours but it had only been a little over 30 minutes. He just wanted him back, was that selfish? Probably, but he just wanted to make sure he was okay and as Izzy said to show him that he at least feels something for him. He was still working on his plan. His brain wasn’t really working today.

His eyes sprung open as soon as he heard the door handle wiggle open. Standing way to fast to meet Magnus as he was walking in. “Magnus, you’re back.” He was sure he sounded far too relieved, but he was. He stumbled slightly as his head began to spin the after effects of standing up too fast.

“Whoa, Alec.” Magnus dropped his bags and rushed to his side. It was sweet he was so worried when he was fine. “Go back and lay down.”

“Yes, Doctor Bane.” Alec pulled at his lip in a teasing manner.

He could see out the corner of his eye he had at least made Magnus smile and took that as a win.

Magnus guided him back to the sofa, telling him to stay. He couldn’t help but laugh at the situation, it was so domestic and something people in relationships would do, yet they weren’t even close.

“Don’t laugh at me, I’m trying to take care of you.” Magnus scolded playfully. “Please, just rest.” Alec’s heart jumped at the softness behind those three words.

Magnus went away and came back in a blur holding something in his hand. “These will help clear your nose and hopefully bring down your fever.” Magnus was being so sweet he didn’t deserve this.

“Thank you, Magnus, for all of this you really didn’t have to go to all this trouble.” He didn’t have to, but he wanted to, and he didn’t think that would ever change. “Why are you doing this for me?”

“Because I care about you,” Magnus spoke softly causing Alec’s heart to do all sorts of flips and just before Alec got the chance to reply, Magnus, bet him to it. “It’s what friends do.” That one word feeling like a lifetime of cold showers. Was that how Magnus felt earlier? It hurt.

He didn’t want to just be friends. He wanted every part of Magnus he was willing to give.

Magnus was so close right now, only a few inches away. He could just lean forward and show him he was always more than a friend to him, he could share his sickness with him, right? Wrong….

He hated the shift he could feel in Magnus once he got back, it was awkward and uncomfortable, something that had never really been an issue for them.

“I bought us dinner. I just assumed you wouldn’t be feeling up to it?” Magnus pulled out two hot containers of pasta.

“Thank you,” Magnus sat an awfully long distance away from him on the couch, he didn’t like it. He continued. “No one has ever done anything like this for me, you know.”

“Really? Do I need to question who your other friends are?” Alec was about to remove the word friend from the dictionary when it came to Magnus.

Leaning back into the couch he let out an exasperated sigh “Magnus,” He could do this. “About before I didn’t mean---” He never got to finish his sentence before Magnus cut him off.

“It’s okay, Alec.” No, it wasn’t he wanted to shout. “There’s nothing to talk about. Let’s just enjoy tonight.” Alec was growing more and more frustrated with himself, he had ruined everything when all he wanted to do was lay back down in Magnus’ lap and let sleep take him for the night.

They finished their dinner in silence, but it wasn’t the good kind. It was uncomfortable, unknown, tension. Everything he hated. He didn’t know whether to leave or to wait until Alec had drifted off. When he looked over he could see him forcing his eyes to stay open as they kept dropping every few seconds.

“Alexander,” Alec startled awake, “Why don’t you go to sleep?”

“Can’t,” His voice was so sleepy and dare he say adorable.

“And why is that?” Magnus asked puzzled.

“Because you are too far away.” He went silent after that, Alec was confusing him.

Only because he could never say no to that face he moved closer. “Is that better?” Alec shook his head. Magnus lay his head back laughing at Alec’s face, he assumed his pout was supposed to be cute? It was, no doubt about that but it was also hilarious as Alec could barely keep his eyes open.

“Where do you want me?” Alec felt like saying ‘in bed next to me’, but he settled for laying down in his lap and falling straight to sleep.

He watched Alec fall asleep only a second after closing his eyes, he really must have been tired. “Goodnight, Alexander.” He whispered to himself. He really should be getting home but he could stay for just a few more minutes.

 

When Alec woke the next morning, he was in his bed, but he was alone.

 

 


	8. Chapter 8

 

Alec woke to a text. The minute he saw the name he had never reached for his phone faster.

**From: Magnus**

  * **Just checking you and your friends are still coming to pandemonium tomorrow?**



Alec had almost forgotten about that, they had talked about it so long ago.

He hadn’t seen Magnus since last Wednesday and there had been fewer texts then normal, so any chance to see him he would jump at.

**From: Alexander**

  * **Yes, we will be there. Thank you for the invite.**



He hovered over his keyboard going back and forth with himself whether to send the second text. Soon his fingers were working on their own accord and the second text was sent.

  * **I can’t wait to see you.**



It was stupid that he thought sending something like that was a big deal when it shouldn’t have been, but Magnus just made him nervous and second guess all his decisions, basically, Magnus made him a mess of emotions and he didn’t know where to place them. He’d been trying to figure out ways to tell him how he felt over the past week but he either hated everything he came up with or didn’t come up with anything instead. Surely, he was making this harder then it needed to be.

He could just walk up to Magnus and say, ‘Magnus I like you, will you go out on a date with me?’ it seemed easy enough in his head, but he knew the minute it came to actually speak it, he would fuck up. How he could mess up one sentence he had no clue, but he guessed he was just special like that.

 

Magnus blushed as Alec’s second message came through, he never used to blush until Alexander Lightwood, the stupid annoying attractive tree he was. He brought out all these giddy feelings he thought he’d never feel again but here they were, the butterflies flying around in his stomach the cheesy smile that would reach his lips every time he saw his name pop up on his screen. It was stupid really, he wasn’t a teenage boy anymore he should be able to contain his emotions, but obviously not.

He hoped ever since hearing those words from Alec the other week maybe he would subconsciously stop feeling anything for him, but that man made it impossible.

**To: Alexander**

  * **I can’t wait to see you either, and your friends**
  * **Hope you are all recovered now?**



**To Magnus:**

  * **Yes, all better now. The stuff you gave me really helped, should I just continue to call you Dr Bane now, or?**



Magnus almost spat out his water.

“Everything alright over there?” Raphael asked looking at him strangely.

He quickly cleared his throat. “Mhm perfect.”

**To: Alexander**

  * **You know that does have quite the ring to it, speaking of which I still haven’t charged my fee**



Alec laughed maybe a little too loud getting a strange look from Izzy as she walked past his room.

**To: Magnus**

  * **I’d be more than happy to pay just tell me when and where**



Magnus didn’t have to think very long before he had come up with an idea.

**To: Alexander**

  * **Okay, how about a dance…with me tomorrow?**



At that moment Alec cursed his two left feet.

**To: Magnus**

  * **I’d love too but I dance like a baby deer on a good day.**



Magnus chuckled at the picture in his head

**To: Alexander**

  * **I’m sure you can’t be that bad, Please?**



**To: Magnus**

  * **I can feel the puppy eyes through my screen**



Alec waited for a response and was surprised to see Magnus had sent him a picture. Opening it he found himself blushing, he didn’t know why. It was adorable. The picture was soon followed by a message.

**To: Alexander**

  * **Did it work?**



Alec had to pinch his lips together to stop himself from laughing again.

**To: Magnus**

  * **Maybe…**



**To: Alexander**

  * **Come on, just one?**



**To: Magnus**

  * **Fine, just one.**



Alec really had no intention of saying no in the first place, but the picture was definitely worth dragging it out.

**To: Alexander**

  * **No backsies, Alexander.**



**To: Magnus**

  * **I promise, no backsies.**



Magnus forced his smile down not wanting to give Raphael another chance to tease him.

  * **You’re coming in tonight, right?**



He couldn’t help but shake his head at the silly question.

**To: Alexander**

  * **Of course, I am**



**To: Magnus**

  * **I’ll see you then x**



Alec didn’t even notice the small x until it was sent, and he wanted to bury himself in a ditch. Sure they had sent x’s before, but he had never initiated it, it was always Magnus who had done so.

**To: Alexander**

  * **Have a great day Alexander x**



Okay, maybe he could breathe again.

**To: Magnus**

  * **You too x**



* * *

“So, do you always have this stern grumpy look on your face when I’m not around.” Magnus watched as Alec was concentrating on something on his computer at the front desk. His concentration face was _shock_ adorable, maybe he would just start hating him for how perfect he always seemed. It was unfair, really.

The bright smile he received made his decision to come in early all the more worthwhile. “Magnus,” God he had missed that voice.

“That is I.” Magnus smiled back.

The last person Alec had expected to see was Magnus, standing in front of him. He just wanted to walk around the counter and hug him, he hadn’t seen him in that long, but maybe that would look too abrupt for the workplace, so he just stayed where he was.

“What are you doing here so early?” It had only just past 6 pm.

“Well, I was hoping maybe I could see you beforehand, but if that doesn’t work that’s okay. Thought I would just try my chances.” He rambled, why was he rambling? 

“I should be able to take my break now, let me just go ask my supervisor.” Alec hadn’t stopped smiling since they had started talking and it really was like a sliver of sunshine on a rainy day. “Don’t go anywhere.”

“Wasn’t planning on it.” Magnus chuckled back as he watched Alec disappear through the back.

He must have zoned out because he didn’t even notice Alec coming back and standing beside him.

“Sorry, What?” He shook his head.

“I asked what you were thinking about.” Alec’s voice was so soft and quiet he wanted to bottle it.

“Nothing, it was nothing.” He smiled back. “So, we all good to go?”

“Yeah, where do you want to go?” Alec asked as they started heading for the door.

“Maybe the little café up the road?”

“Perfect.” Alec’s cheeks were starting to ache from smiling so much, he really wasn’t expecting to see Magnus this early and while Magnus was still here he had no doubt that smile wouldn’t go anywhere.

They made it to the Café and found a quiet corner and settled down in their seats.

“I hope your boss wasn’t too annoyed?” Magnus bit his lip in worry.

Alec sent him a reassuring smile “It was fine, I promise.” Magnus took a deep breath and relaxed as their conversation continued to flow.

* * *

 

“So today wasn’t a good day?” Alec frowned.

“I wouldn’t say it was bad, more stressful.” Magnus sighed. “Training the newbies is tiring, and a lot of money in glasses, they always break so many,” He half chuckled, half groaned.

“Oh god yeah, I can imagine.” Alec chuckled back.

“But, it’s all part of the job and they are all lovely, so it makes up for the shattered glass everywhere.” Time must have gotten away from them as Alec’s break was already coming to an end.

“Sorry to cut this short but I should get back.” Alec hesitated.

“Of course, let’s go.” Magnus stood up following Alec. Not knowing what came over him, he found his hand in Alec’s. He had held his hand plenty of times before why did this time feel so different? He was just about to remove his hand, but Alec intertwined their fingers before he could let go.

They walked back to the cinema in silence, he had no idea what Magnus was thinking, he wanted to ask but didn’t.

They stopped walking as they made their way inside, both turning towards each other. Alec couldn’t decipher the look that was currently on Magnus’ face, it made him feel uneasy not knowing what to expect.

“Alec,” He met Magnus’s eyes waiting for him to continue. Why did he feel nervous? “You and me, us, what is---”

“So this is what you mean when you say to meet you here.” Magnus startled by the sound of Ragnor’s voice, his heart had been beating so fast he needed to breathe.

Alec blinked back his surprise Magnus’ words still circling his brain and wondering what exactly he was about to say.

They didn’t seem to notice they had just interrupted something, but that was Magnus’ friends, annoyingly loveable idiots.

Alec tried to focus back on what was happening in front of him shaking off his nerves, he introduced himself. “Hi, I’m Alec.” They probably already knew that, right? He didn’t actually know. A rock seemed like a fun place to go hide under right now.

“Oh, we know who you are.” Raphael laughed. “Alexander this, Alexander that.” Magnus would disown his friends after this he was sure of it.

“Hi, Alec. Yes, we already know who you and we have heard _a lot_ but only good things.” Magnus had talked about him? “I’m Caterina.”

“Nice to meet you all, Magnus talks about you all the time.” Alec’s palms were starting to sweat, all Magnus’ friends were so intimidating.

“And here we were thinking he hated us,” Raphael smirked.

“Oh, I do. I just own a business with you cause its beneficial for me.” Magnus threw back. “Anyway, that’s enough for now, Alec has to get back before he’s late,” Magnus said as he was physically pushing him away from his friends. “Sorry about them, they’re annoying,”

“I wouldn’t call them annoying, they seem nice,” He finished unsure. “I just want them to like me.”

“They do, trust me, if they didn’t that would have gone completely different.”

“I’m a little nervous for you to meet my friends too,” Alec averted his gaze to the floor. He hadn’t introduced anyone to his friends in like forever he was pretty sure.

“You’re nervous? Why?” Magnus chuckled.

“They can be a lot.” Alec chewed at his lip unknowingly.

“Nothing I can’t handle.” Magnus paused. “Plus I’m sure there are some fun stories I don’t know about you yet.” Magnus chuckled lightly.

Alec threw his back with a big sigh “You know on second thought maybe I will just come to the club on my own.” Magnus loved this dramatic side of him.

“Don’t be silly, it will be fun.” He hadn’t realized but their hands were still linked, making the goodbye just that little bit harder.

“Magnus,” Alec spoke softly. “About before, you never finished what you were going to say.”

Magnus swallowed the large lump that formed in his throat. “Oh, it was nothing, it doesn’t matter.” He lied. Now thinking back he couldn’t believe he was about to ask Alec what this was between them. For once in his life, he actually wanted to thank Ragnor for interrupting. “Now, go back to work before I get kicked out for making you late and then can never come back again.”

Alec laughed, “See you, Magnus,”

 

* * *

 

“Hey, Iz” He knocked gently on her door. “Can you help me choose an outfit?” He only had to wait a couple of seconds before the door flew open and she was already walking towards his room. “Before you get carried away and rummage through my closet.” He rolled his eyes at her eagerness. “I have already picked out some outfits I just want you to help me pick one, I’m in a rather indecisive mood.”

“It seems you are always in an indecisive mood,” Izzy mumbled under her breath.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Alec frowned.

“Nothing,” Izzy shrugged continuing to his room.

Alec shook off the weird interaction with his sister and made his way into his room.

“You know, these are actually really good choices,” Izzy said sounding surprised.

Alec stood there proudly. “I like to think so.” He wasn’t horrible with his fashion choices he just never got many chances to show them off. “You know contrary to your long belief of me being a hopeless dresser, I actually own many nice clothes.”

“Since when? I have never seen you wear any of these?”

“On the odd occasion that I do go on dates I do like to look good,” Alec shrugged stepping forward looking over his choices again.

His first one was a pair of beige pants cuffed at the ankle paired with a deep blue button up and some white vans to go with it. 

His second one was a little more formal and maybe too much for the club. A Pair of navy blue jeans, a white button up and beige blazer to go over the top. He wasn’t sure if wearing white to a club was a good idea.

His third one was slightly more casual, a short sleeve blue and white printed button up, with Black skinny jeans and pair of black hi-top converse to go with it.

“So?” He asked turning to Izzy who kept looking back at the outfits and then back to him.

“What do you like best?” She asked.

“I like the short sleeve shirt and black jeans but is that too casual?” He asked unsurely.

Izzy frowned like she was thinking but not about the clothes. “Then wear that one then, they would all look really good.” She paused. “Why are you so worried about your outfit?” She asked a curious glint in her eye.

Alec averted his eyes. “No reason,”

“Yeah right, you just did that thing that you do if you’re lying or feeling nervous.” She prodded. “This has something to do with Magnus doesn’t it?”

“Nooo,” He paused pulling at his lip. “Yes, okay, fine it does but it doesn’t matter.”

She started smiling at him, he hated when she gave him that smile. “What are you planning in that head of yours?” She asked.

He really didn’t want to tell anyone just in case it didn’t go to plan but this was Izzy and he could trust her. “I was planning to possibly tell Magnus how I feel tonight,” He paused. “But before you get all excited over it I don’t want anyone else to know otherwise I’ll get too flustered and probably mess it all up.” He was waiting for some response from her but when he looked up all he saw was a wide smile meeting his.

“I’m only going to say one thing.” She paused.

“And that would be?”

“About fucking time.” And with that, she turned to head out of his room.

“This is why I don’t tell you these things,” He shouted back as she left his room. All he heard in return was her laughing sounding a little too pleased with herself.

When she was gone he shook his head trying to get around the idea that he was actually going to do it. He felt a mix of nerves and excitement, he had always been telling himself, what if he doesn’t feel the same, but everyone always told him that he did. He felt if he didn’t do anything tonight they would just keep going around in circles and never really know how the other feels. Surely, nothing could go wrong tonight?

He was in love with Magnus, and he was going to tell him.

Hearing those words in his mind created a swirl of butterflies to circle his heart making it beat at an increasing rate.

Pulling himself together he got up and grabbed his outfit and headed for the bathroom, he could do this.

Just as he was playing around with his hair Simon entered his room, flopping down on his bed.

“You alright there?” Alec laughed.

“Your sister just kicked me out her room, apparently all I do is annoy her when she’s getting ready.”

“You are a little annoying.” Alec teased.

“Hey, don’t be rude, asshole.” Simon huffed.

“Kidding, kidding.” He laughed. “You can stay in here until I’m ready if you want?”

“Thanks, but I was planning on staying anyway, so.” Simon shrugged.

Alec rolled his eyes.

He had known Simon since high school when he first met him he thought he would have hated him, but they actually got along great and he was always there for him when he needed him and vice versa. Their friendship did change a little when he started dating Izzy, but they were still as close as ever, he thought of Simon like his brother.

“So, Alec. I hear I am finally going to meet as you so eloquently put it once _god’s gift to the world.”_ He gets drunk one time, and they never let it down. He was never going to drink again. “You know I’m a little offended I haven’t met him yet.” 

“Firstly, did I say that? Everyone says so, but I haven’t seen any proof, and secondly, I didn’t want to scare him off the minute I met him.”

“Excuse me, I would not scare him off,” Simon gasped offended. “You know what sometimes I question why we are friends.”

“Me too,” Alec laughed dodging a pillow flying his way.

“Are all Lightwoods assholes or is just the ones under this roof.” Simon groaned.

“Hey, I’m just kidding. If I’m being honest the only reason I didn’t introduce him sooner is that I was scared, and it was unknown territory for me, for what it’s worth I think you will really like him.” He smiled to himself at the thought of seeing Magnus soon.

“Izzy was right,” Simon added.

“Right about what?”

“He makes you happy like no one else has.” Alec found himself blushing at his words.

“He really does, let’s just hope I don’t fuck it up.” Alec left the bathroom heading for the door.

“Are you done, do you have any drinks here?” Simon asked following him

“Yeah, somewhere in the fridge, I just have to go see Izzy quickly.” He paused trying to hide his smile.

“What for?”

“To tell her that you called her an asshole.” Alec ran out of Simon’s reach.

“You wouldn’t.” He yelled running after him.

Just as they came to Izzy’s door she appeared looking at them like they were a couple of idiots. “What are you two doing?”

Alec opened his mouth, but Simon jumped in before he could even get a word out. “We were doing nothing, just going to get some beers like a couple of bros, yeah okay, oh you look beautiful by the way.” He rambled. Alec snorted suppressing his laugh.

“Okay,” Izzy frowned still looking confused. “Can you get me one while you’re at it?”

“Of course, love you.” Simon pushed Alec towards the kitchen.

“You’re such a mess, that was awful.” Alec laughed reaching the fridge.

“Shut up, this is all your fault.” Simon sulked grabbing the beer from Alec’s hand.

Alec feigned offense. “Me? I merely was just going to see if my sister was ready I don’t know what you thought I was going to do.”

Simon looked at him like he was dead inside. “I hate you.”

“Love you too, buddy.” Alec smiled taking a sip of his beer.

“Who are we loving?” Maia appeared along with Izzy.

“You, we are loving you,” Alec replied walking over and giving her a hug.

“What’s got you in such a good mood?” Maia laughed

“It’s not a what, but _who_ ,” Simon added a grin only too smug on his face.

“Shut up, I’m allowed to be excited to see my friends.” He sighed rolling his eyes.

“Speaking of _friends_ ,” Maia paused making quotation marks. “When do we have to head out to Magnus’ club?”

Alec ignored her and took a quick look at his watch. “I said we would be there around 9 pm so hopefully Clary and Jace will make their presence known soon,” Alec took another sip of his drink.

Maia’s eyes seemed to light up at that. “Clary is coming?”

“Yes, why?” Alec asked laughing under his breath.

“Oh, no reason.” She bit at her lip. “She’s single right?” Everyone chuckled. “What?” She exclaimed.

“That wasn’t even the tiniest bit subtle Maia,” Simon laughed. “I thought Alec was chaotic.” 

“I don’t have a subtle bone in my body, I can’t help it.” Maia shrugged it off. Alec secretly wanted some of that confidence. “Anyway, none of you answered my question.” She sulked.

“Yes, she is very single.” Izzy laughed before turning her attention to him. “Speaking of chaotic,” Here it comes he thought, getting in an eye roll before her next words were even out of her mouth. “Is our trusty friend, Drunk chaotic Alec going to make an appearance tonight?”

“It was one time,” He groaned, ironically taking another swig of his beer. “And no, I will not be getting drunk tonight.”

“Should we all take bets on this?” A voice came from the hallway. Jace and Clary were here, f _inally_

“I’m down, I say 50 bucks he will be drunk within the first hour,” Simon chimed in going over to greet Jace and Clary.

Alec had to suppress his smirk as he watched Maia and Clary send each other heart eyes, they were ridiculous.

“Nah, I at least give him a good hour and a half,” Izzy added.

“I’m willing to bet Magnus ends up taking him home because we all know he is Alec Lightweight Not Lightwood.” Jace laughed at their side.

“When we get there, I’m pretending like I don’t know any of you.” He paused second-guessing all his life decisions that had led to these bunch of idiots being his friends.

“You love us really, it’s okay we know.” Maia took her eyes off Clary long enough to reply.

“Can we go before I have put up with anymore slander from my supposed friends,” Alec mumbled downing the rest of his beer before reaching for his leather jacket and heading out the door and considering locking his friends inside.

 

* * *

 

 

“Dude, have a drink you look so tense,” Simon said as he passed Alec a drink. One wouldn’t hurt, would it?

“I’m not tense, I’m fine.” His voice came out rushed and maybe an octave higher.

“Whatever you say, but your face says something else.” Simon snorted.

The minute he entered the club he felt the nerves build. Maybe doing this tonight wasn’t a good idea? There was a lot of people and if it went wrong they would all witness.

No.

He was going to do it. Was he?

If only Magnus would hurry up he was hoping the nerves would subside. He had been scanning the room for him for the past 15 minutes, but all he could see was a cluster of strangers dancing and talking.

Taking a quick sip of his drink he cringed at the taste, whoever had gotten this obviously had bad taste, it was awful.  

It was so loud he could barely hear the conversation around him, even if it wasn’t loud he was too lost in his thoughts to focus anyway. The bass of the music vibrating through the floor and making the nerves increase. Maybe another sip of the drink wouldn’t be a bad idea? It really was disgusting.

Taking a deep breath, he looked back into the crowd, his breath was knocked out of him as his eyes found him. He looked amazing. He always looked amazing, but it was something about how the lights shone against his skin making him look like an angel walking towards him.

He was wearing a black sheer shirt making Alec feel weak at the knees and he wasn’t even standing. The silver chains dangling from his neck, Alec needed another drink.

But what really took his breath away was the smile he saw when they found each other’s eyes, the smile he had come to love.

 

Magnus walked closer, excitement bubbling through his veins, Alec looked stunning. He could see Alec’s eyes taking him in making him feel strangely exposed as he watched his hazels travel until they meet his eyes. Everything around him became irrelevant as he made his way closer.

“Hey,” Alec spoke, still trying to find his breath.

“Hello, handsome” Magnus would never get sick of seeing that small tint of a blush crawl up his cheeks.

Leaning in he placed a gentle kiss to his cheek enjoying the feel of his skin beneath his lips.

Pulling back Alec tried to steady his racing heart. “You look amazing,” It was the only thing he could think at the moment.

“As do you, dear.” Magnus beamed back.

Alec scratched at the nape of his neck feeling a little shy now that Magnus had arrived. What happened to liquid courage?

They both kept looking at each other, not saying anything, letting what Alec thought was now an uncomfortable silence grow until someone from behind them cleared their throat bringing Alec back down to earth.

“Right, friends,” Alec mumbled under his breath. Stepping aside Izzy appeared first.

“Hey, I believe we have already met,” She laughed.

Magnus brought her in for a hug. “Nice to see you, Izzy, I hope you are enjoying yourself.” He was glad Izzy was the first to greet him, seeing another familiar face was comforting and settled his nerves.

“We are, this place is amazing.”

Another young woman appeared at her side, similar height, dark curly hair. He recognized her almost immediately. “You must be Maia, it’s nice to properly meet you.”

“Yes, we all knew how much Alec loved serving you, so we just left him to it, but it’s nice to finally meet you too.” Magnus watched as Alec’s eyes blew wide he had to try and contain his laugh.

“Is that right?” Magnus teased.

Alec choked on air, was that possible? For him it was. Reaching for his drink he mumbled some reply he wasn’t sure made sense. Why couldn’t Maia just stick to sending heart eyes to Clary all night?

“Hey, I’m Simon, I’m not sure what Alec has told you about me, but I have heard a lot about you.” So far Alec’s friends were nice. The cute embarrassed reactions Alec would make every time were just an added bonus.

“So, you’re Simon.” Magnus smiled back.

Simon turned to Alec. “I swear to god, what did you tell him?”

“Nothing, just that you called me an asshole and that I don’t like you.” Alec grinned back.

“Can someone give me permission to pour my drink on him.”

“As much as that would be quite amusing, I’m not sure Raph would be too happy with me.” Magnus pointed to the man behind the bar.

“Guess who is going to tell Magnus all your embarrassing stories.” Simon laughed back.

“Oh, Simon I think you are my new best friend.”

“I feel betrayed.” Alec sulked sitting down and finishing off his drink.

“You played yourself.” Jace laughed at his side.

“Shut up.” He groaned back.

Time past and Magnus was getting along with all his friends, maybe a little too well. He decided he was going to disown Simon as his friend after this as he listened to him finish the third embarrassing story from his high school years.

“Alec had this massive crush on one of the football players and wasn’t paying attention where he was walking in the corridor and walks straight into someone’s open locker door. It was the highlight of my High School life.” Simon laughed, avoiding the scowl Alec was sending him.

When he heard Magnus laugh he forgot why he was annoyed, watching him throw his head back his adams apple bobbing up down as his melodic laugh spilled out of him.

Magnus couldn’t help but steal glances at Alec’s very visible pout as Simon continued to tell him stories, it was very adorable.

“Simon thank you for sharing these, but I better go and try and turn that frown upside down.”

“I have more if you ever want to hear them.” Simon answered before quickly looking at Alec mumbling under his breath “If I live to see another day.” And Smiled brightly at him.

Magnus made his way over to Alec taking a seat next to him. “You know you look adorable when you’re moody, darling.” Alec tried to bite back his smile, but his blush was already creeping up on his face and gave in soon enough. “There it is.”

“Stop it,”

“Stop what?” Magnus laughed. “I did nothing.”

“I hate my friends,” Alec sighed leaning his head back on the seat.

“I love your friends.” Magnus couldn’t take his eyes off Alec, sitting this close he was enamored by his beauty he just wanted to kiss that pout off his lips.

“You can keep them,” Alec groaned back.

“Are you sure? Imagine all the baby stories Izzy could tell me.” Magnus teased.

“On second thought, you can just keep me, none of my friends allowed.” Magnus liked that idea.

“Why don’t I go get us some drinks, I can get Raphael to make my special cocktail, it’s amazing I promise.”  

Alec thought about it, he had only had two drinks a third would be fine? “Yes, that’d be amazing.”

“I’ll be right back.” Magnus stepped in front of him leaving a frazzled Alec. He had no idea if his initial plan was going to actually come to life or if it would just fester away in his head.

Alec thought he would only take 5 minutes at best, but it was 15 minutes later, and Magnus still wasn’t back. Turning his head, he scanned the room until he found him still at the bar, an unfamiliar feeling waved through him as he watched a lady next to him getting a little too close for comfort. He wasn’t jealous, was he? The feeling only grew when the woman whoever she was made Magnus laugh.

Trying to pull his attention away from that he tried to focus on something else, it didn’t work.

His eyes found a bunch of shots set out on the table, shuffling forward he leaned in his seat. “Whose shots are these?”

“Magnus had them brought over earlier,” Maia answered.

Not even thinking he grabbed two and downed them quickly, hating the taste as it made its way down his throat.

Maia snorted. “What happened to I’m not getting drunk?”

“Did I say that? Hmm funny how fast the night changes.”

Maia’s facial expression changed, “Are you okay? You don’t seem yourself?” She asked concerned.

“I’m fine, just getting worked up for no reason, the nights not really going to plan.” He sighed feeling the after-effects of the shots still rushing through his body.

“What do you want to happen?”

“I wanted to tell Magnus, that you know, I like him, but as you can see I’m the biggest disaster to walk the planet, so I don’t think it’s going to happen tonight.” Maybe he should have another shot to drown his sorrows.

“Hey, just relax and be yourself you don’t have to push yourself to tell him if it feels natural, tell him, if not just leave it for another day.” Maia was right he was getting so caught up in this idea of telling him that if he didn’t it would feel like a failure but really, he could tell him when it was just them, no one to interrupt them. But then seeing things like he just did, it scared him that he would be too late and miss his chance altogether.

“Speaking of future hubby, here he comes. Just relax.” Maia said quickly before sending Magnus a brief smile and turning back towards the others.

“Hey, sorry that took so long.” Magnus rushed as he sat down passing Alec a drink. It looked fruity.

“It’s okay, you’re back now.” He smiled before taking a sip of the drink not knowing what to expect, he was pleasantly surprised. “This is really good.” He hummed.

“I wasn’t lying when I said they are really good.” Magnus chuckled, catching Alec’s attention for the 100th time that night. He wanted to bottle the sweet sound.

“Hey, you want to dance?” Alec asked on a whim, wanting to try and shake off the weird feeling he had been having the whole night.

“I’m shocked, are you Alexander asking _me_ to dance?”

“Well, I did promise no backsies, so, shall we?” Alec stood up reaching out his hand for his.

The alcohol he had earlier must have gone straight to his head as he stumbled a little as he stood feeling a bit disorientated.

“Whoa,” Magnus laughed reaching out to hold his arm instead. Magnus had nice hands. “Are you sure you’re okay to dance?” Magnus asked a smile still on his face but there was a concern in his eyes.

“Positive, let’s go,” Magnus found Alec’s over eagerness amusing.

Once they reached the dance floor Alec looked like a deer caught in headlights not knowing what to do. “You’re supposed to dance, sweetheart.” Magnus laughed stepping closer. Alec still did nothing, stepping closer he wrapped his arm around his back pulling him closer leading Alec to sway back and forth with him to the beat.

_We can just dance to this_

He could feel Alec slowly relax as the beat increased. Alec’s eyes were locked on his making his heart jump a mile a minute.

_We can just dance to this, push up on my body, yeah_

Alec could feel Magnus’ hand on his back, a wave of shivers running all over his back. Magnus closed his eyes and he watched as he let the music live between them, losing himself to the beat. He was so close he could just lean forward and kiss him, it felt right? But instead, he said, “You’re so beautiful.”

Magnus opened his eyes, meeting hazel. “So are you.” Magnus moved his hand from his back, trailing up and over his shoulder. Here in this moment, he felt the closest he had to Alec yet. It was like no one else was around them, just the two of them whispering sweet nothings.

The night continued like that, going back for more drinks and back to the dance floor, feeling the gravitational pull between them each time, no matter who they were dancing with on the dance floor they always seemed to find each other, by the time it was time to leave Magnus’ heart was about to explode.

Magnus had taken Alec out back to get him some water, to try and sober up as he mumbled gibberish to him.

“Hey, Magnus did I just dance with the devil, cause damn it’s hot in here.” Alec laughed to himself as he finished his sentence. Magnus pinched his lips suppressing his laugh as he passed Alec his water. “Come on let’s get some water in you.”

Alec took a big gulp before starting again. “Hey, Magnus,”

“Yes, Alexander.” Magnus shook his head.

“I’m a thief and I’m here to steal a dance.”

“How is it stealing, if I would willingly dance with you?” Magnus teased.

“Oh,” Alec paused looking puzzled until a look crossed his face like he had just had an epiphany of some kind. “What about your heart, can I have that?” Magnus swallowed the lump that rose in his throat. He had no idea what to say back, he knew this was just harmless drunk babble, but what Alec didn’t know was that he had his heart long before tonight.

“How about we get out of here?” Magnus asked standing up and lifting Alec in the process.

“Oh, yes, let’s go on an adventure,” Magnus shook his head. Drunk Alec was too much.

Dragging Alec back to where his friends where he said his goodbyes and told them he would get Alec home and safe.

“Goodnight, it was nice to meet you all,”

“Adios bitches,” Alec yelled and his friends all laughed back.

“Ayeee, our chaotic drunk is here.” Simon roared back. “See ya, buddy.” He ruffled Alec’s hair causing Alec to pout.

Walking out of the club Alec at his side, he couldn’t help but let a laugh escape him “You always seem to still surprise me, Alexander.”

“I love when you call me Alexander, but only you, no one else.” Alec stumbled closer to him as they waited for a cab.

“Only me?” Magnus asked.

“Yes, when you say it I feel special, I don’t know I guess that kinda sounds stupid.”

Magnus walked closer holding him close, so he didn’t do anything stupid in his drunken state. “You are special, so I’m glad it makes you feel that way.” Alec turned to look at him, he watched his eyes look at every feature on his face.

“You’re pretty.” Magnus found himself blushing. “I like your smile.”

Just before Alec was going to say something else a taxi pulled up beside them, Magnus was thankful worried his blush would soon get out of control.  

Finally managing to get Alec in the car he quietened down, something was on his mind. Eventually, he was laying in his lap while Magnus gently guided his fingers through his hair.

“Hey, Magnus,”

“Mmm?”

“How can you tell if someone likes you back?” Alec’s words just falling out, he wasn’t meant to say that.

“What do you mean?” Magnus pondered over Alec’s question.

“I don’t know you just like this person and you want to know if he,” Alec quickly cleared his throat. “ _They_ like you back.”

Forcing his brain not to over analyze what Alec was saying he turned his head to the window. “If I ever find out, I’ll be the first to tell you.”

Everything fell silent after that, Alec didn’t really mind it his head was a bit foggy. Magnus slowly caressing his fingers through his hair helped his mind stop spinning.

“Why does everything feel likes slow motion.” Magnus was bought out of his haze.

“Hmm?”

He waited for Alec’s reply, but it never came, all that came were small giggles filling the silence.

“What’s so funny?” Magnus couldn’t help the smile forming on his lips.

“I don’t know.” Alec continued to laugh, the taxi driver started to send them weird looks.

Alec’s laugh was like sweet a symphony, like a perfect harmony blending together making him feel happy and he soon found himself joining in.

Here they were both in the backseat of a taxi looking like crazy people laughing at absolutely nothing, and well it only made him fall in love with him more.

The car came to an abrupt stop at a red light, Alec almost falling from his seat if Magnus didn’t grab him in time. Everything went silent again until he noticed the cheeky smirk playing on Alec’s lips.

“My hero,” He sighed dramatically.

Magnus went to drop him just as quickly and the smirk soon disappeared, and a rather high pitch scream erupted from his mouth. This Taxi driver was about to kick them out he was sure of it.

“Please don’t drop me, otherwise I’ll be sick.” That soon changed Magnus mood from a teasing one to a serious one lifting Alec back up straight.

“How long have we been in this cab, I’m bored,” Alec grumbled, growing restless in this small car.

“We are almost there,” Magnus assured him seeing his apartment building up ahead.

Alec jumped on the spot. “Where are we going? Where are you taking me?”

Magnus laughed, he wasn’t taking him anywhere in this state. “Home,” He paused. “My apartment.”

“What?” Alec exclaimed, disappointment all over his face. “The nights still young.”

“We can still have fun at my place, plus, I’m sure the chairman misses you, he sulks more than normal.”

“The Chairman? Yes, that cat loves me.” Alec practically yelled startling both himself and Magnus and also the Taxi driver. Their names would probably be blacklisted by the time they get out.

Soon enough they were out of the Taxi, Magnus had paid the cab driver extra for his tip hoping that would make his night better and the scowl he had magically disappeared.

When he turned back around Alec was staring at him. “What?” Magnus hummed.

“Nothing, just admiring the view.” Alec pulled his lip with his teeth, it was like he knew it drove Magnus crazy.

“How shameless, and I thought that was my thing.”

“Learn from only the best what can I say.” Magnus chuckled as he reached the stairs.

“Magnus,” he waited for him to continue. “We should get pizza, I’m starving.”

“Sure, we can order in.”

“What, no, let’s walk. It will be fun.” Alec protested.

“No way, it’s cold and I’m tired come on Alec, Chairman is waiting.”

“Oh, yeah.” Alec practically raced up the stairs to the front door.

Once they were in the safe confines of his loft, he watched Alec immediately go for the fridge bringing out two bottles of water and passing one to him.

“Oh wow, look at you being responsible.”

“You know, some would call me the responsibilist,” Alec mumbled, his words starting to slur,

“That’s not a word,” Magnus laughed back.

“Well, I am making it a word, now where is that cat.” Alec waltz off with a mission in mind. “Chairman, where are you? Come to get your nightly snuggles with your favorite person.”

Magnus snickered at Alec’s comment. “I’m sorry, but you’re his second favorite. I already hold number one spot.”

“We will see,” Alec shrugged it off so nonchalant, a sly grin on his face. This confident almost smug side of Alec was, on one hand, infuriating but on the other also endearing and only made him want the night to keep going because honestly, he hadn’t had this much fun in a long time, and Alec looked to be having fun too.  

“Chairman, Chairman, Chairman,” Alec yelled throughout the entire loft.

“You’ll scare him away with all that yelling.”

“No I won’t, he likes the sound of my voice.” So do I Magnus thought.

Magnus sat down and let the scene play out in front of him, finding it amusing watching this giant look for his tiny cat.

Every time Alec searched a room his pout only grew as he couldn’t find him.

Magnus knew exactly where Chairman was but watching Alec search was the best entertainment ever.

“Where is your goddamn cat?” Alec grumbled as he came nearer to the couch about flop down next to him but before he got the chance to squash Magnus like a pancake a soft meow came from the balcony.

Alec sprang into action so fast he was scared he would fly off the balcony.

“Magnus, you shouldn’t leave your doors open like this.” Alec huffed.

“It’s the balcony, it doesn’t matter.”

“Yes it does, you don’t know who could climb the building and enter your home.” Alec paused raising his finger. “I have seen it in movies.”

Magnus laughed. “You have seen like 2 movies in your whole life.”

“Yeah, well, those 2 movies had something like that in it.” Alec huffed back. There were a few silent beats between them until Alec’s demeanor shifted. “I just want you to stay safe.” Magnus' heart stumbled at his words. Feeling like he froze and flushed all over at the same time. Alec, on the other hand, didn’t even bat an eyelid.

Why did Alec have to do and say all this stuff while drunk, why couldn’t he do this when sober, when it really mattered.

Trying to shake off his thoughts “I am safe, I promise.” He smiled back at him hiding his inner struggles. “I have Chairman to protect me.” And just like that, the moment was forgotten.

“Oh, yes, speaking of which.” He had to laugh at how fast Alec could switch like that “Ahh, there you are. Don’t worry, never fear I am here to save you from Magnus.” Alec teased glancing a quick look his way feeling pleased when he got a reaction.

“Oh, please Alexander.” Magnus waved him off going to the kitchen to order Pizza.

Alec pulled Chairman closer. “Thank you for protecting Magnus, I know how hard he can be.”

“Hey! Stop that. Chairman don’t listen to him.” Magnus yelled from the kitchen. “Why are you trying to pit him against me.” Magnus scowled at him as he walked back into the lounge.

“I’m not.” Alec grinned. “I swear.” Giving Magnus his puppy eyes only making Magnus roll his eyes in response.

“Also, bad news, the Pizza place is closed but I have some snacks?”

“Oh,” Alec sounded disappointed. “How rude of them to close.”

“The rudest.” Magnus joined in.

They both came and rested on the couch. “Snacks will have to do then, I guess, thank you, Magnus.”

As soon as Alec was sitting down Chairman pawed his way over to Magnus, curling up in his lap, leaving a very offended looking Alec.

“Chairman, I can’t believe you betrayed me. I thought we had something. Guess I was wrong, no more treats for you.” Alec sulked stuffing some chips in his mouth.

“You gave him treats?” Magnus exclaimed. “That’s bribery. No wonder he goes to you.”

“I had to do what I had to do, and I don’t regret it one bit.” Alec shrugged leaning back suppressing the laugh that was building in his chest.

“You’re ridiculous.” Did Alec just poke his tongue out at him?

After a few minutes of sitting down he could see just how tired Alec was, passing him some water he said, “How about we get some sleep, It’s getting late.” Magnus stood up reaching out his hand

“Good idea.” He mumbled following Magnus. “Wait.”

Magnus stopped abruptly waiting for Alec to continue.

“Can Chairman sleep with me?”

Magnus laughed. Alec and his cat were ridiculous. “Yes,” He shook his head in amusement.

Magnus lead him to the guest bedroom throwing him some sweatpants, turning around while he got changed.

“You don’t have to turn around,” But Magnus felt like he did. Alec was drunk, and he didn’t want to take even the slightest bit advantage of him.

“Just hurry up and get dressed.” Magnus huffed trying not to think what Alec’s long legs looked like.

“It’s safe,” Alec laughed.

Magnus turned around slowly, peeking his eyes open he saw Alec getting into bed next to a comfy looking Chairman.

“I’ll go grab you some water.” Magnus knew exactly how Alec was going to feel the next morning.

Magnus came back, and Alec was snuggled down into the mattress eyes closed clinging to the poor cat. He couldn’t fight the urge to bend down and place a small kiss on his forehead.

Alec hummed and stretched at the touch.

Before Magnus could leave Alec mumbled something he could only just make out. “Can you lay with me for a bit?” There was no harm in doing so, right? And how could he say no to such a cuddly looking Alec?

Magnus moved around to the other side shuffling in beside him but still leaving some space between them.

He could faintly see Alec smile softly at him in the moonlit room. It was quiet as they both stared at each other neither of them finding sleep just yet.

“Magnus,” Came Alec’s sleepy voice.

Magnus shuffled the smallest amount closer. “Yes?”

“You know I like you right?” No, this wasn’t happening, this wasn’t how he wanted to know.

Squeezing his eyes closed his pushed back the frustration threatening to bubble over.

“I wanna kiss you.”

Taking a deep breath and pushing the feelings away he replied. “Get some sleep, Alec,”


	9. Chapter 9

Magnus told himself he would leave in 5 minutes, but 5 turned into 10 and soon enough an hour had passed by, and he was still lying next to Alec. The words he said still turning through his mind. He wished he had an off switch for his brain, it was never helpful in these situations.

_“You know I like you right?”_

The way Alec had said it like it was the most obvious thing he had ever said, but why at every chance he thought they were getting closer, Alec would pull back or say something that meant something completely different. It was like playing tug of war with his heart and he was worried one day the rope would fray, unable to handle it anymore. If Alec really did like him, he wanted him to show him and not just tell him in a drunk passing comment.

_“I wanna kiss you.”_

The number of times he had imagined his soft lips melting into his, the thought alone creating an ocean of emotions to swell around his heart. Until now he always thought that would be a long-forgotten fantasy but now, he wasn’t sure, but the unexpected hope that was rising in his chest was trying to tell him it may be a possibility. How did he have hope but keep his heart protected at the same time? He needed to know, he knew Alec meant no harm, but his heart didn’t feel safe in the palm of his hands right now.

Pulling himself from his thoughts before he got lost for the night he made his way quietly out of bed, taking a quick glance back at him. If only one night he would get to spend the whole night with him, and it actually means what he wanted it to mean. He wanted to spend a night in his arms and let himself be overtaken by the warmth, he wanted to hear his soft snores and smile fondly as he teased him about it. He wanted to kiss him good morning, not caring about morning breath. He wanted Alec.

But he couldn’t have him, at least not yet.

Closing the door gently he made his way back to his room, settling in bed but nothing about his heart or mind felt settled. He was lucky if he got any sleep that night. Turning over in his covers he burrowed himself down trying to hide from the reality that was waiting for him when he woke up.

 

* * *

 

Alec woke with the worst headache he had ever encountered, whoever invented alcohol needed to invent a cure for the morning after. Keeping his eyes closed he tried to suffocate himself in his pillow not wanting to see the light of day. His mouth was incredibly dry, and he was pretty sure he was dreaming about water at one point.

The longer he was awake, more memories of the previous night came back to him. He almost thought the pillow was a better idea than facing Magnus right now. A muffled groan filled the air as he remembered the words he said to him last night. He remembered the look on his face. And it wasn’t exactly a positive one. So much for telling him how he feels he thought.

Why couldn’t they just be together, why did he have to use words. Well, actually he did use words just not the ones he had planned on using and not exactly at the right time.

His inner wallowing soon came to an abrupt end when there was a soft knock at the door and Magnus’ annoyingly perfect face poked through, he looked so beautiful even after a night out, what was his secret?

“Hey,” Magnus’s voice was so soft it was soothing, maybe Magnus could be his hangover cure, he liked that idea.  

“Hey,” He said back rubbing at his eyes, hoping he didn’t look too disheveled.

“I made you breakfast, with a side of water and a couple painkillers,” Magnus’ smile was teasing.

“You are a lifesaver, Magnus Bane.” He sighed leaning against the pillows while smelling the delicious aroma that entered his room, he wasn’t sure if it was the food or Magnus.

“I have been told that a few times, but don’t get used to it, you are a handful when drunk, my dear.” Magnus smiled bringing a tray full of food his way, but when he didn’t meet his eyes he knew something was wrong.

“I’m so sorry for that Magnus,” He rushed out wanting to see his rich brown eyes back at him.

He could see Magnus hesitating before his eyes and he wanted to ask what was wrong, but that was a stupid question and he knew it. He already knew what was wrong.

“Don’t be sorry, I had fun.” Magnus got up to leave.

“No, I meant,” He paused. “Doesn’t matter,” he sighed. “I had fun too.” He saw something flash across Magnus’ eyes, something he couldn’t quite pick. He could see his mind turning, both of them were, yet neither of them was saying what they wanted. It seemed skirting around the reality was easier.

Easier, but ten times more painful.

“I’ll be out here,” Magnus finally left, leaving an uncomfortable silence in his place.

Alec immediately reached for the water, feeling like he had never tasted anything nicer in his life. Swallowing the pills and eating what he could of the food, he headed for the shower trying to delay ending up out there with Magnus for as long as possible, he just couldn’t do it today. He knew he owed Magnus something proper, but he didn’t even know where to start, that and his brain wouldn’t stop screaming at him whenever he moved.

After his shower he felt a little better, but not in the way he wanted to.

Gathering up what dignity he still had he made his way out to the kitchen.

“Don’t worry about the dishes, I’ll do them later.” Magnus’ voice startled him from behind.

 

 

* * *

 

The second Magnus heard Alec leave his room he immediately felt his breath freeze, he’d tried to tell himself he was prepared for this, that he would be fine, but the minute he saw him and his wet hair swept to one side, the light stubble lining his jaw his mind was brought back to _I wanna kiss you_ and his eyes were drawn to his lips in an instant. This was going to be harder then he thought.

Putting a smile on he swept it to the side, deciding to try and ignore it for as long as possible.

“Are you sure? I don’t mind doing them.” Alec insisted.

“I’m sure, how are you feeling?”

“Honestly,” Magnus suppressed his laugh at the sound of Alec sighing. “Like someone threw a brick at my face.”

“Surely you’re just being overdramatic.”

Alec wasn’t sure if he was happy Magnus was ignoring what happened like it didn’t happen at all, or if he was annoyed. God, he couldn’t think straight. He snorted to himself over the irony of that thought. There was nothing straight about this situation.

“I’m not, I don’t know why I drank that much.”

“To be honest I’m a little confused why you drank that much as well.” There was something about his tone that felt off.

“I’m sorry, you had to look after me, that wasn’t how I wanted the night to go.”

“How exactly did you want the night to go, Alec?” He knew this was more than just an ordinary question, Magnus was challenging him to open up, they both knew what he said last night.

Alec froze like he always did in uncomfortable situations. He couldn’t deal with this right now. “You know,” He stuttered, was it hot in here? “Have a good time, not embarrass myself would’ve been a good start.”

“Did you not enjoy last night?” Magnus wasn’t going to let this go he could see it in his eyes.

“What, no, no, that’s not what I meant.” Alec panicked.

Magnus leaned against the bench getting comfortable in his position, he saw something change in his eyes.

“Well, what do you mean Alec, because I am having a hard time trying to figure out what you mean, not only now, but all the time.” Magnus could hear the frustration in his own voice, he was tired of this. He just wanted a yes or no answer.

The last time Alec heard Magnus’ voice like this was when he had been pushing him away. He didn’t like it. “I’m not sure what you want me to say.” He swallowed around the lump that formed in his throat.

“Are you seriously playing dumb right now?” Magnus didn’t care if that came across harsh.

“I’m not playing anything, you’re the one who asked me a vague question.”

“Do you need me to spell it out for you?”

“Probably,”

If he wasn’t hungover he would definitely have a headache now.

“About last night.” Alec’s heart began to race.

“What about last night?”

Magnus tilted his head down pinching the bridge of his nose trying to compose himself. “You’re so infuriating.”

“Excuse me?” Alec didn’t like how fast this was escalating.

“Why can you never give a straightforward answer?” Magnus sighed taking a seat at the table.

“Probably because there is nothing straight about me.” Alec mused, but regretted it the minute he said it judging by Magnus’ face he didn’t find it amusing.

“This isn’t a joke, Alec.”

He had no clue what he was doing it was like his mouth was saying something completely different to what he actually wanted to. But he had never been able to have what he wanted and now that there was a chance he could, it was terrifying.  

“Did you mean what you said last night, I need to know,” Magnus added feeling exhausted not even wanting to continue this anymore if Alec was going to make it this hard he didn’t want to try anymore, but something wasn’t letting him give up. “Please,” It was quiet and full of the last fight he felt he had today. It was a plea, he just needed Alec to answer it.

“What did I say?” Alec even hated himself for saying that, it was like he saw the last strand of hope inside Magnus disintegrate. Why was he being so stupid? The million dollar question he thought, but really it was the easiest to answer, he was scared.

When he finally admits it to Magnus it becomes real, his feelings, everything will be out there in the open, vulnerable, for the taking, to be trampled on if he gave anyone the chance. He’d be open to rejection. He was scared. Scared to lose him, but it seemed he was losing him anyway.

“I said a lot of things.” He added.

“What do you think I am talking about, Alec? Cause it’s certainly not about you raving about my cat all night.”  He didn’t like watching Magnus like this, yet he didn’t stop it. “Look, Alec I don’t mean to be rude, but can you just leave.” His heart stung as the words stabbed at him.

Feeling too exhausted to draw this out any longer he agreed, “If that’s what you want, I will go.”

“You know that’s not what I want, I want the truth,” The truth was all he wanted, he wanted to know if what he said last night was true if he actually felt anything for him. The only conclusion he could come up with was that Alec didn’t mean it and that was why he was fighting it so much, and if that was the case he just needed to be alone.

How was it even possible to get your heartbroken without even being in a relationship?

“I’m not sure what you want me to say,” That was it he couldn’t take it anymore.

Getting up from his seat he looked back at Alec, “You can let yourself out.” He disappeared to his room not wanting him to see just how shattered he really felt.

Alec left soon after. Shutting the door behind him it broke him in more ways than he thought, he felt like he just closed the door on the love his life, losing him without even having the chance to show him that love in the first place. He broke his own heart.

Every fiber, every muscle was screaming at him to go back, to tell him it was true. That not only did he like him, but he was in love with him. But he didn’t, instead, he left leaving the mess he had caused behind.

 

Magnus heard the front door click shut, but all it sounded like was his heartbreaking in half. He wanted to scream, he wanted to shout, but all that came were silent tears. Just once, he would have liked to be loved back.

 

* * *

 

 

When he arrived home, he wasn’t expecting to see everyone in the living room.

“Alec,” Izzy yelled. Why wasn’t she quiet like any other sane human. “You’re home.”

“I am.” He mumbled back.

Maia motioned for him to come to sit next to her. “So, tell us all about it.” He hated that she was smiling, even looked excited. It was a shame he had nothing to tell other than he and Magnus had a fight.

“Nothing to tell,” He shrugged hoping they would just let it go.

“What do you mean there’s nothing to tell?” Izzy questioned. “You said you wanted to tell him how you felt.”

“Yeah, I did. But then I got drunk and ruined it all. I fucked up big time.” He fell back against the couch.

“What do you mean, fucked up big time? Alec, what did you do?” Maia frowned at his side.

“I said,” pausing, his headache was coming back. “Before I fell asleep I told him I liked him and that I wanted to kiss him.”

Izzy, Maia, and Simon all looked at each other like they were trying to figure out what was wrong.

“Wasn’t that the point of last night? Or am I completely misinterpreting the words ‘tell him how I feel.’” Simon answered looking just as confused as the other two.

“Simons right, I mean sure the delivery wasn’t as planned as you liked but I’d still call that telling him how you feel,” Maia added.

“Did you just say I am right?”

“Don’t get used to it, Lewis.”

Izzy still hadn’t said anything like she was off in her own world. “Alec, if that was the only thing that happened, then why do you look so devastated?” She questioned. “Is there more to the story?”

Alec let out a deflated sigh, “Yeah,”

“This morning when I got up he questioned me about it, but I just kept acting like I didn’t know what he meant. I’m pretty sure he doesn’t want anything to do with me now.”

“But, you meant it right?” Maia asked.

“Of course, I meant it, I have never meant anything more in my life.”

Out of nowhere, a cushion hit him hard in the face. “What the hell, Izzy!?”

“Did it knock some sense into you? God knows you need it.”

“Gee, thanks, Iz.”

“She’s right Alec, this is going to be hard to hear but I don’t think you realize just how much you may have hurt Magnus. You told him you liked him and then ripped it away the next morning. I don’t mean to speak for Magnus but from what I saw he seems to be smitten with you,”

He felt sick at the thought of hurting Magnus.

“All I know is that if that happened to me, it would have hurt,” Maia added.

Oh, god, he was the worst. How was he meant to come back from this?

“Alec, buddy, you’re an idiot,” Simon added.

“Okay, I get it, I’m a clueless asshole, instead of insulting me can you please help me try to fix this.” He had done the one thing he had never wanted to do.

“What do you want to do?” Izzy asked.

“I want to run back there and tell him I love him, and that I never want to hurt him again. I want to give him the world. I want to show him that I love him and am never going to let him go.” Alec stopped himself before he rambled on and ended up saying a whole essay.

What annoyed him was the others all just stayed quiet, what a help they were.

“Are you guys going to say anything?”

“We don’t need to, you said all that needs to be said,” Maia replied.

“What? Why are you all being so cryptic?”

“Alec, oh dude, may the gay lords be with you. You literally just said what you should do. Go back to Magnus and tell him you love him.” Simon rolled his eyes growing tired of Alec’s cluelessness.

Standing up from the couch he got knowing smirks from all three of them. “I need to change my clothes.” Before turning to go to his room he said. “Love you all”

“We love you too, even though you can be an idiot sometimes.”

* * *

 

 

Magnus had declined two phone calls from Alec since he left, it was little too late. The only thing he felt like doing was lying on the couch snuggled up with his cat as he watched shitty romcoms to try and cheer himself up.

There was a buzz at the door, but he really wasn’t in the mood for company, so he chose to ignore it whoever it was would go away eventually. This person, however, did not want to give up, this time knocking instead of pushing the doorbell. The knocks only got louder, who the hell was this person?

Figuring whoever it was wasn’t leaving anytime soon, he dragged his body off the couch making his way to the door. “Okay, Okay I’m coming you don’t need to knock the whole apartment down.”

Magnus reached for the door handle ready to open and close it as fast as the other. But what greeted him at the door was not what he was expecting to say the least. “Alec?” He frowned. “I don’t really feel like seeing you just yet.”

Alec scratched at his neck. “I know but can I…. Can I please come in? 5 minutes tops I promise.”

Magnus moved aside letting Alec pass. “Your 5 minutes started the minute you got here so you better hurry you only have 2 left.”

“What?” Alec was about to protest, but he really didn’t see the point in arguing for his remaining time. “You know what, that doesn’t matter, I only need 30 seconds.” He started pacing back and forth the nerves increasing as every second ticked by.

Magnus’ heart began to race.

“You want the truth?” Magnus nodded as his heart continued to try and throw itself out of his chest. “I remember what I said last night, every god damn word. I remember seeing you lying across from me and wanting to pull you close, I remember looking at you and getting lost in your eyes, I remember wanting you like never before,” He needed someone to pinch him was he dreaming?

Magnus could feel the tears well at the edge of his eyes as Alec stepped closer. Was he breathing? He wasn’t sure, it felt like all the air between them had vanished.

Alec was smiling, and he thought he couldn’t get any more beautiful, but he was proven wrong yet again.

“Magnus, I meant it. I’m falling for you, I have fallen for you. Ever since I laid eyes on you I knew I was done for.”

Magnus was frozen, stunned speechless by Alec’s words. He just wanted to grab Alec by the shirt and kiss every inch of his stupid face.

“Magnus, I love you.” Alec’s breaths were labored and short, his heart thrashing against his chest. He watched Magnus trying to gauge what he was thinking but he wasn’t saying anything, he couldn’t figure out what was going on inside that head. When Magnus didn’t say anything after a while he worried he went too far. “Magnus, listen I---”

“Kiss me.”

“What?”

“Last night you said you wanted to kiss me, so kiss me.” Magnus let his eyes fall to Alec’s lips and back up to his eyes, waiting and hoping for him to lean forward and kiss him, and that’s exactly what he did.

It was slow and perfectly timed as he gently caressed down Magnus’ face feeling the soft skin beneath his fingertips. His eyes never leaving him, he watched as tears formed in his eyes. The moment his eye’s traveled down to Magnus’ lips the tension in the room doubled and then he was doing it, he was leaning in, getting closer and closer until their lips met and Alec felt like everything fell perfectly into place.

Magnus knew it was coming but was still startled when their lips met. Alec’s lips softly molding with his in soft gentle movements. He’d never felt anything like it. The warm feeling spreading through his whole body as Alec wrapped his hands around his waist bringing him closer. The kiss was effortless, everything he had imagined and more. It was perfect in a way he couldn’t describe.

Alec went to pull back as Magnus followed nipping at his lips. Their eyes met for a quick second, smiles on both their faces as they fell back into the kiss like they had been doing it for years, remembering every bump, and curve. It was deeper, more like they were clinging to each other both not wanting to let go.

Alec’s heart was racing as Magnus pulled him back, his hand making its way up his arm into the back his hair sending shivers all over his body. He was addicted and never wanted to stop kissing him.

Eventually, they pulled apart both breathless, resting his forehead against his. “I love you too, you idiot,” Magnus chuckled full of breath as he rested his head against Alec’s shoulder just enjoying the feeling of being in his arms.

Alec smiled as he felt Magnus sink his body into his embrace, wrapping his arms around him just that little bit tighter. It was nice being able to hold him without anything holding him back. “You do?”

“Yes,”

“So, this whole time we could have been together, but instead we were both too scared to tell the other how we felt?”

Magnus chuckled against his chest lifting his head and looking up at Alec. “Well, when you put it like that, yeah.” He paused leaning up and kissing him on the chin just because he could now. “I guess we were both idiots.”

“But now we are each other’s idiot.” Alec beamed.

“I like the sound of that.”

“Me too.”

“Spend the rest of the day with me?” Magnus asked not wanting Alec to leave anytime soon. “I hear cuddles are a great hangover cure.” He grinned.

“Well, in that case.” Alec linked their hands. “I better stay then.”

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know your thoughts and all that, it's much appreciated. :)


End file.
